Mediation with a teen

[LeBridge]

Has anyone done this? Is it even possible for just one parent and a child rather than the wider family?

Gentle bump

I haven’t exactly, but when DS1 needed some additional support a few years ago, we saw someone who saw us both together and then after a session or so I scooted out at the appropriate time. I am really sure you could find someone with experience in family work to do this for you.

She wont engage with anyone at cahms or similar so getting her help is fruitless and her dad says it's all my fault so I need to go to mediation with her to work out her problems with me. Him not parenting her is not a problem in his eyes. He is there to be her best friend and unite against me and there's no discipline or consequences to even getting suspended from school so when she's with me she can't cope with any boundaries.
I am so fed up today of everything being my fault.

Could she live with her dad temporarily?

You absolutely can- called family group conferencing in my local authority. Google your local early help team phone number

She is and going downhill as he's not there very much and she's looked after by various people or left on her own for long periods. She's vulnerable and I'm worried sick about her. Her school performance is down, she's late most days, has been suspended, no internet restrictions and has already been engaging in inappropriate sexual messaging online to strangers. She now has a boyfriend and spends most weekends with him and I'm worried she's going to end up pregnant.

Early help weren't interested. We did have a social worker but they closed the case saying there were no significant concerns despite self harm, the sex stuff, running away, school issues, relationship issues. They have more pressing cases they said.

Did you disclose all of the above to early help?

Yes and it was escalated to social worker but now nothing

Yep tried this with DS.

It didn't work simply because according to him I was the root of all his problems.

SS were involved for 6 years they did nothing with him but sent us parenting classes....

In the end we kicked him out. He's now 19 doing well and very sorry for the hell he caused

My advice is sit down wither her and make a list each of 6 things/behaviours she wants and you want.
You both get 1 veto.
If you agree on the 6 things then thats your starting point.
Just think about if a 10pm in time is the hill you want to die on compared with birth control for example.