Partner won’t make out or kiss for long

[Bumblebist]

My partner is very affectionate we kiss cuddle have amazing sex but he although we kiss all the time he won’t make out or kiss for long. It’s a big turn on for me. We’ve spoken about it but long kisses and making out isn’t for him. I guess there’s nothing I can do he’s the most perfect man I’ve ever been with and so loving so it’s not an issue in the long run I guess I’m just venting a little or asking for advice although I would never force him to make out with me if he didn’t want too x

Why doesn't he want to? What's he got against it, given that he knows how much you love it?

If he loved something that you liked but didn't love, would you do it lots because you knew it'd make him happy?

If he doesn't enjoy it he doesn't enjoy it. It's a shame but at least he's honest.

Yes I probably would do it to make him happy but I also am badly a people pleaser and do to much to make other people happy he’s just said it does nothing for him and he doesn’t really enjoy it

Has he always been like this OP or is it a relatively new thing?

You just need to work out how important it is to you, then. You can't change what he likes. You can only choose your response to it.

Obviously I have no clue about your situation but how is your dental hygiene? Do you drink coffee all day and have coffee breath? Do you smoke and your partner doesn't?

All reasons I have not been to kiss partners in the past, it is hard and awkward to bring up, easier just to pretend you're not a fan of kissing.

What is 'making out'?

Is it because he doesn’t like the way you kiss?

Making out? I always thought that was teen speak for kissing .

I think the obvious question is how long is long?

No, he shouldn’t do things he doesn’t like just because you do. If you didn’t like oral sex - or BDSM, or anything- and he did, would it be reasonable of him to expect you to do it? Of course it wouldn’t.

It’s a shame that you have a mismatch in this; you can decide how important that is to you. If he’s ace in other ways, I’d just adjust your expectations. There are plenty of other ways to be aroused.

@aSofaNearYou

I think the obvious question is how long is long?

This

Does nothing for him? .. ouch

Depends. Is it just this one thing? Or are there other aspects of your sex life that you would / wouldn't like - is he open to your opinion on those? Is he generally keen that you have a good time and not just focused on himself?

Making out? I always thought that was teen speak for kissing

And I thought it was America speak for having sex.....

clueless

One thing you can't fake if you are not into it.

How long are you expecting to snog for?

What is making out?

I like kissing for long periods of time whilst cuddling and my partner was less inclined…I asked if there was a particular reason. He said it turned him on too much so wasn’t ideal when in the middle of the day etc

Could be similar?

Frustrating for you but I'm the same I hate long kissing so I don't do it either