Going Teetotal Today

[Makemineaprosecco]

So it’s midnight which is pretty appropriate actually as it’s the start of a new day and I’ve been lying in bed trying to sleep, let’s just say I’ve had a tough time recently my relationship was in a really bad place, I lost my youngest cousin to alcoholism ( she was 38 when she died alone in her flat ) I have finally reached the point in my life where I recognise that despite not being what anyone would describe as an ‘alcoholic’ I am/ was a problematic drinker a person whose parents and relatives regularly used alcohol to solve problems I suppose it’s not entirely surprising that I grew up and at some level thought this was just what people did if life was hard. I’m married to a wonderful man have two insanely beautiful clever and funny children and I’ve reached the point where I actually don’t think I can be a good mum if I’m drinking every night.
It amuses me in a wry way the lies we tell ourselves about alcohol I know I have done it especially this last year, ‘ I’ll only have 2 glasses when you know you’ll finish the bottle so many mini deceits to kid myself that it doesn’t matter when it does. I have a significant mental health history due to trauma and I’ve been self medicating for years with bloody prosecco of all things it has to stop now
I have too much to lose so dear mumsnetters reach out if you can as I’m alone just now and offer me some words of encouragement as I’m sure it’s not going to be easy but I’m damned if I’m going to let addiction define me, it’s time.
(By the way if anyone can tell me how to change my user name I’d be grateful as for obvious reasons it’s now inappropriate!) maybe it should now read make mine a bitter lemon as that’s going to be my drink of choice from now on.

Hey everyone well it’s been a few days now and I thought I’d share how I’m doing, I still don’t miss it however it’s Friday so this evening may be more of a test. I’ve noticed that my face looks different it’s lost it’s puffiness and my eyes look clearer I’ve had more energy for completing tasks at home so basically so far so good ! Thanks again to all those who have offered support I’ve never posted on anything like this before it’s been great to have some replies

@Makemineaprosecco

So I guess I’m not the only one struggling to sleep !! Thanks so much for the support I really appreciate all the suggestions, I think replacing alcohol with exercise is a really good idea I would ideally like to lose 4 stone so hopefully going sober will really help

Try exercising with Anna - she has loads of workouts of varying lengths and intensity, and she's lovely:

Can I join you in being teetotal? My drinking once again had crept up. I did dry January and did a dry month during June. Have alcohol free nights in the week. But then ruin in by drinking at least a bottle, sometimes plus another couple of glasses on the other nights. I want to stop.

My tip is to (initially at least) allow yourself enough sugar, especially at the time you would normally have your first drink. A lot of people who quit alcohol inadvertently quit sugar too(which is obviously a positive thing long term) which causes a relapse. Your initial glass of Prosecco in the evening is full of sugar and I’m convinced some people’s bodies start to crave the sugar rather than the alcohol. So after attempting to cut down many times, I swapped my first glass of wine in the evening with a can of coke (pored in a nice glass with ice and lemon) sometimes this was genuinely enough to satisfy what I thought was alcohol cravings. If you’re replacing alcohol with diet drinks or sugar free tonic water you might fail because your body is then losing out on your sugar fix too which I suspect for a lot of people is why they fail to cut down their alcohol consumption.

Well done. You can do this.

As you are being really god to yourself at the moment I would recommend taking up a hobby where you have to think and use your hands. Just so you don't get caught off guard in six months time (guess how I know that). Identify the times you typically had a drink and do your hobby during those times.

You're on the silver cloud at the moment but that does end, so any hobby of activity will help distract you when the euphoria of quitting damps down.

Take one day at a time, don't make promises you can't keep such as 'I'll never drink in my life again'. Don't beat yourself up either, you didn't drink to the level you did on purpose, it always creeps up on everyone that drinks too much.

Beware of supermarkets at Christmas. I went in one a few years ago when I stopped drinking and counted alcohol in 32 different areas of the shop. It's sad that it's so universally accepted as ok when it causes so many social problems.

Well done - that's the best decision you could make!

It may be really hard at times (good advice re sugar by the way - sugar is itself addictive and trying to quit both at once may be too much).

But remind yourself of the benefits - your DH and DC will see a better you, you will be healthier, likely live longer, have better skin, lose weight (you said you wanted to), a clearer head, save money, more energy.... the list goes on.

A pp suggested not making a big deal of not drinking when you're out, which I completely agree with. If someone directly asks you why you aren't drinking you can either say 'just don't fancy it' and move on, or say 'health reasons' which people tend to respect.

The future's bright!!

I gave up alcohol 9 years ago and it's the single best thing I've ever done. I never had 'just one' so it was total abstinence for me.

Yes it was hard but everything is just so much better; my health, my relationships with everyone, my mental health, my motivation ...it's a fantastic way to live my life and I'm only sorry I didn't do it sooner.

It was hard in the early days but now I can honestly say the thought of having a drink turns my stomach.

Good luck.

That’s a good point about the sugar. Each time I’ve given up alcohol, I crave chocolate. It would be good if I manage that too.

I’m three months in and had my first full night out with drinks last night. Had a good time but took it steady. Single measures when I’d always double up. Stopped drinking at 10pm.

My sleep last night was appalling. Woke at 4am wide awake. Struggling to switch off now. Felt anxious.

But, no desire to drink tonight. Or for the next month until my friends come over again.

That’s the level I wanted to be at: social drinking roughly once a month and that’s where I shall remain.

Good luck all.

Hey everyone so it’s nearly the end of day 9 and I have to say I’m feeling really good, I am so surprised I thought I would feel awful! It’s a positive feeling being in control for a start, I also think that having plenty of cold diet drinks like cloudy lemonade and decent cordial has made a real difference. my skin is clearer my tummy is flatter ( I have a long way to go before my weight is under control but at least it’s a start ! ) By far though the biggest difference is how much energy I now have and how much time I seem to have that I didn’t before, because I used to just sit and drink and do nothing else after about 8 thirty I reckon it will be harder the closer it gets to Christmas so thanks for the tips about what to say as I don’t want to preach to anyone as this is just a personal thing for me I will try to find a hobby that’s creative and will keep busy ! Good luck anyone who has chosen to join me