Advice on relationship with partner

[Lucyloo1234]

I need some advice but background information is needed. Around the start of lockdown my partner got full custody of her daughter so she went from living with us 3/4 days a week to 7. On top of this i ended up being quite ill and after blood tests I was b12 deficient, but extremely low. My levels were way below what the doctors considered low and even though I had the course and am on them monthly I still have the symptoms of the deficiency. Along with dealing with these I work two jobs, on in the day 5 days a week so I am around for DSD finishing school and then I work two nights til 12am.

The issue is my partner and I have only been having sex on a weekend and he finds this an issue and it is causing major strain on our relationship. I am absolutely exhausted during the week with work, school runs, homework, the daily chores in the house and picking my partner up from work which is about a 45 minute round trip. DSD is also in high school now so has a later bed time. I'm not sure how to work this issue out, ans it just causes arguments to talk about it. Does anyone have any advice or any experience of the b12 deficiency so I can relay these to him.

Thanks in advance

He doesn't understand when someone's unwell?
Another saying wake up - you're being used.
Now you're not performing as expected he's got the huff.

He doesn’t sound very supportive to you. Is there any way you could afford a small second car so that he can drive himself to/from work? That would save you so much time every day. I would be tired doing everything that you do, and I don’t have a B13 deficiency!

I also wonder whether your doctors have investigated you fully? Why are you so low in B12 and is your body absorbing it properly? Have you had a coeliac screen? Also, make sure they check your thyroid health and iron levels as well. If you are not feeling better despite the injections and you feel there is more to it, don’t let the doctors tell you that there’s ‘nothing wrong with you’.

Ultimately, his behaviour would put me off sex personally, tired or not.

You've certainly drawn the short straw and are running yourself ragged.
If you want to stay in this relationship I think you need to sit him down and basically tell him exactly what you've told us in your opening post. I've only got borderline B12 deficiency and it has slowed me down no end. I'm surprised you are managing what you do!

He needs to acknowledge your illness, all that you contribute to the smooth running of your family and stop being a sex pest. End of.

You sound in complete awe to him - is he older by any chance.

Because everything about this is wrong - even paying 50/50 for his child.

Please call womens aid or get some help - have you got family support because this sounds all wrong

What a lazy sod it's not your child so not your responsibility, your partner is using you as a housekeeper and nanny ,who pays half the bills then he expects sex as well on top . Throw him in the bin OP.

@Lucyloo1234 you are not saying anything. How are you justifying this scenario to yourself. You are working 2 jobs to pay 50/50. You are in charge of the school run of his child. You are doing the childcare and housework. Even without the b12 deficiency you are already doing way more than is your share and all you are concerned about is that he is not happy with the anount of sex. How?. If you were not there how would he be doing all these things?. Please learn to love and value yourself. You dont deserve this.

Jesus OP, you’re hugely being taken advantage of. You pay 50/50 despite his daughter living with you - why? You are left to run around after her, again, why? Why did he take on full time custody of his daughter when he can’t actually provide care for her?

I really don’t get what he’s bringing to this relationship. You’re paying half the bills, provide free care for his daughter, pay 50/50 towards his daughter, cook, keep house and work 2 jobs.

He works, and that seems to be it, and you don’t even get any benefit from him working these long hours because he only pays for half of everything.