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Original poster

He keeps bringing up my ex

9 replies

Merh · 17/10/2021 23:23

I’ve been seeing a guy who said pretty early on he’s not in the space for a relationship. I had just come out of a serious relationship too and I liked him but agreed I’m not in the space for a relationship. We have been seeing each other for 6 months and we don’t see other people but it’s quite casual we see each other once a week for a sleep over. Anyway it was recently my birthday and my ex sent me some flowers. Guy I’m seeing asked who they were from, I told him as I’ve got no reason to lie. I don’t have feelings for my ex and we have spoken about this in the past.

He called me a day later and kept mentioning that a man I was previously in love with sent me flowers. He kept mentioning the fact I loved my ex as some sort of issue. He then said he feels like he’s entertaining for now but I seem like I want more from somewhere else? I didn’t really know how to respond, I feel like he’s thrown a lot at me and it’s all a bit too heavy for casual. I also feel like I have feelings for him so maybe I’m reading too much into his words?

OP posts:
Crinkle77 · 17/10/2021 23:25

If does seem a bit odd that your ex is sending you flowers.

Original poster
Merh · 17/10/2021 23:27

I get it, we are still friends. Not even close friends but there’s no bad blood there we just get on better as friends.

OP posts:
AliceinBorderland · 17/10/2021 23:30

OK so if he is unhappy just being entertainment for you (his perception) is he going to offer more?

I'd ask him that. He can't have it both ways

Pinkbonbon · 17/10/2021 23:31

I think if you have developed feelings for him then its time to walk away op.

I'm sure some will say that maybe he is looking for something more serious with you now and so is jealous your ex sent you flowers. But that's unlikely in my opinion.

Much more likely he is having a hissy fit that you have been cool with just being a fwb because his ego can't take that you've not fallen in love with him. Not because he wants you. But because he wants you to want him. And that's far too much drama. It's time to go.

It's none if his buisness if your ex sends you flowers. He can't have his cake and eat it.

OverweightPidgeon · 17/10/2021 23:34

He can’t say he’s not ready for a relationship and then act as if he’s in one - he sounds like trouble to me and he will never let this drop if you do become an item.

AliceinBorderland · 18/10/2021 07:18

Or maybe it is that horrible entitlement men often feel. They don't want you but don't want anyone else to have you.

Sparklfairy · 18/10/2021 10:59

There can be an element of "ownership" in men's heads when they have sex. Generalising, but they like the principle of no strings but it only goes one way.

notacooldad · 18/10/2021 11:01

Or maybe it is that horrible entitlement men often feel. They don't want you but don't want anyone else to have you
Exactly!!!

SarahBellam · 18/10/2021 12:16

Just say, 'so what? We're not dating.'

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