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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to I cope living with awful exh? So triggered by him

24 replies

MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 17:12

I have had to name change for this, don’t want to out myself.
In the middle of divorcing exh, who insists on living together, can’t get him to go, solicitors say it has to wait until the financial orders are made.
I keep myself to myself and let him do his thing with dc and do my own thing with them. He says to them that mummy doesn’t want to come with us. He keeps telling me I’m making a mistake, constantly tries to talk me out of it, its wearing me down. When this stops working he starts saying I’m a bad mum, that I am damaging the children, that I am abusive to them, I have not done anything to them. He says I am a danger to children and should not be around them, and even says I’d be an unfit granny. His reason for all this is because I was abused as a child (by a neighbour – not parents). He says my mind is messed up, so it makes me totally imagine things up that he has done to me, like cheating – which he admitted, but then denied, thane admitted, denied. I lost track. He says I am traumatised and I am divorcing him based on fictional mistakes I think he’s made, and my mind is so messed up that it makes up untruths and I will do the same to dc. I ignore him. Eventually he stops and goes back to telling me how much he loves me and how much he wants to try again, doesn’t work, then he goes back to the same bad stuff. He says I’m the worst woman he’s met, then I tell him to sign the papers, he then says he will not give up on me, and feels sorry for my poor little traumatised body and mind. FGS. He also suggests we change to a parenting marriage - but this is another manipulation. I have been in touch with women’s aid, they have told me he is abusive, manipulating and controlling. I feel so trapped. It really gets to me when he tells me I am an abusive mum, I don’t react but I think he can see it pushes my buttons. How can I cope with this, how do I not get triggered? I feel so trapped. I can't afford to leave or I would.

OP posts:
phoebewallyfridge · 15/10/2021 17:19

So sorry to hear that you are going through this.

It sounds like a horrible situation.

I hope someone comesalong who can offer you some practical advice!

It sounds as though you are being really strong for the DC and once everything is sorted you will look back at this and think just how worth it it all was just to get away from him xx

MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 17:24

@phoebewallyfridge thank you so much x

OP posts:
Lbnc2021 · 15/10/2021 17:27

I had to live with my exh for 2 years after we separated and he was just like this, always gaslighting me. I ended up going to a refuge then into a council house. I couldn’t be happier now. It’s hard, I’m not going to deny it but I got there in the end.

frozendaisy · 15/10/2021 17:29

Find some statements to shut him down.

Write a list. Memorise it.

Have you listened to yourself?
Stop not around the children.
Our marriage hasn't worked out, it's a shame but it happens.
We are poison together.

How can you think this is going to endear me to you.
I'm not listening to this again.
Etc etc etc

MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 19:17

@Lbnc2021thank you, maybe one day I will qualify for a refuge!

@frozendaisy thank you for these phrases, this is what I need. Apart from when he says "no we're not poison" that's just your past making you think that, it's really messed you up, you poor thing. I want to help you.

OP posts:
Chewieboora · 15/10/2021 19:25

What a disgusting creature. How dare he use your trauma against you? If that doesn't make you absolutely certain that you're doing the right thing, I don't know what would.

Well done you OP. I wish you the best for the future.

I don't have any advice unfortunately, maybe just "okay" whenever he says anything? Don't feed the troll type stuff. But maybe that's not helpful.

Cherrysoup · 15/10/2021 19:28

I’d definitely add ‘Stop using my past trauma against me. There is no correlation’. Asshole is the optional end to that.

Sakurami · 15/10/2021 19:32

Ignore him and walk away when he speaks to you, he's trying to get a reaction.

Have a handwritten card that you shove in his face saying "you are a cheating etc. Do not talk to me"

MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 19:36

@Chewieboora gosh it helps me see that this was the only decision, he reaffirms it overtime he carries on. Strange that he can't see that, but who cares. I just can't wait to be out of it. Okay is actually a good reply, because it's only when I defend myself he says more back. So I'm going to try that, and try to stay consistent, instead of falling into defending myself.

OP posts:
MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 19:46

@Cherrysoup when I say stop using my trauma like that, he says "you poor thing, I know it hurts, I will look after you" I tell him where to go, he says "your anger is with the past not with me, I know its hard" unbelievably frustrating.

OP posts:
Chewieboora · 15/10/2021 19:48

Yes, I noticed I couldn't use reason/logic/facts with exh as everything got twisted, a complete mindfuck.

How long have you got to go?

Hopeful22 · 15/10/2021 19:49

Omg thats absolutely horrendous. What a living hell for you. And what a bustard to be using all this against you.
Ignore him completely as much as possible, I know how hard it is ( from experience) but he's trying to use everything and anything against you .
Despicable, please stay strong . Do you work have you any income to support yourself at all ?

RandomMess · 15/10/2021 19:49

Have spoken to national domestic helpline to see if his emotional abuse is sufficient to obtain an occupation order?

MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 21:27

@Chewieboora I've probably got 9 months more, fingers crossed. He doesn't comply with anything though, court dates, dragging everything to the slowest possible speed.

OP posts:
MashedPotatoPie · 15/10/2021 21:29

@RandomMess yes I've had some support via women's aid, the occupation order has been denied, they said this kind of abuse is so hard to prove and get an order for.

@Hopeful22 yes I do work, so have my own income to support myself and dc, just not enough to move out.

OP posts:
Justilou1 · 15/10/2021 21:32

Please tell me you are keeping detailed notes of everything he says. Dates, times, context…

NowEvenBetter · 15/10/2021 23:21

Record him. Secretly if you’re scared of him.
At the first sign of him getting aggressive, get the police to remove him.
Don’t give him any attention at all, grey rock, stop placing any value of the drivel he spews, you only need bare minimum communication about parenting the people you both chose to create. Anything else is for solicitors. Not your problem.

MashedPotatoPie · 16/10/2021 10:18

Recently, every time I tell dc off, for minor things, which is rare, he will say stop abusing them. You are hurting them, in front of them.

OP posts:
category12 · 16/10/2021 10:22

@MashedPotatoPie

Recently, every time I tell dc off, for minor things, which is rare, he will say stop abusing them. You are hurting them, in front of them.
That's parental alienation.

I think bollocks to the legal advice to stay in the house, you and the kids need to move out - either to a refuge or a rental. This is a massively emotionally abusive situation for you all.

Justilou1 · 17/10/2021 03:58

You need nanny cams

bibliomania · 17/10/2021 09:35

Grey rock. When he talks to you, mentally say "blah, blah, blah" over it. Mutter absent-mindedly "Oh very good,". Make bets with yourself about what line he'll take before he starts talking and start finding him slightly comic.

StrangerFings · 17/10/2021 10:06

I'm really sorry you're going through this. I've come out the other side of a very similar situation, and I know it feels like it's never going to end. Keep pushing the solicitors for the finance order - this was the only point where my exh began to make plans to move. In the meantime, yes, GreyRock works. Make time for yourself, get out of the house for walks. Enjoy your time with the kids..remember you're a good mum, and the kids will know that you are,. All this stuff he's saying to you is horrendous - and a controlling mechanism. The stuff with the kids is very difficult though and you may need to find somewhere temporarily. Remember what he's telling you isn't you and it will be over.

Purplewithred · 17/10/2021 10:18

You have my sympathy - I had to house share with XDH for 14 months, came out of it 2+ stone lighter and borderline anorexic. What made my life immeasurably better was

  • switching from defending myself/feeling I had to engage with his rants to what I now recognise as “grey rock” as PP have said above - I had a couple of responses, a sort of non-committal “uh huh” and a bright “if you say so” every so often while mentally writing a shopping list/listening to a piece of music/musing about The Archers plot lines
  • getting out. If there is anything you can do to speed up your separation do it.

An acrimonious separation is like childbirth - painful messy and humiliating, but over relatively quickly and very well worth it in the long term.

RandomMess · 17/10/2021 10:34

So the abuse has ramped up since you last enquired about an occupation order, worth asking again now that he is undermining you in front of the DC he is also emotionally abusing them.

Thanks
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