How do i stop friendship jealousy eating me up..complicated.

[malificent7]

My long standing friend and I have long had a complicated relationhip . She can be more like a frienemy and in the past has dated my ex boycriends etc so boundary issues. Due to my low self esteem I stayed friends.
Ff a few years and her mum us dating my dad 5 months after my mum died so complicated feelings/ dynamics.
Firstly , my dad spends more time with her than me. I loved art as a child and met my friend through art...my dad encouraged me not to follow art as it is a precarious career choice. Sge used to dissuade me too...and I used to listen.
My friend is a succesful artist and he gives her full support...drives her to shows, bangs on about how great she is.

I feel so resentful and jealous. I know its bad . First i lost my mum, my mate has gained my dad so i see kess of him but i am jealous as she has my dream career/ life. How do i get over it before i get bitter.

I can't talk to him...he would get defensive.

Anyone? I know i need to see a counsellor ideally

So your dad encourages your friend to do art, but not you? You need to distance yourself from this so called friend. This all sounds an extremely complicated situation and rather unhealthy. Find your own interests and your own life. If you get another boyfriend Id keep him well away from your 'friend'.

It’s not too late to pick up the threads of a career in art. Do evening or weekend classes with a respected college to kick start. Say nothing to anyone about this initiative. Perhaps try a medium tour friend doesn’t use if you want to avoid comparison- textile or sculpture or carving, anything.
Slightly tongue-in-cheek but harness the bitterness and resentment to motivate you 😬

How would you broach the subject with your Dad?

How old are you?

If you mention anything to my dad about negative feelings he closes up completely and goes into gaslighting denial mode.

Well friend has a dp and i have a fiance ....she just does not respect my boundaries i find.