Relationship over

[Skater123]

Been in a long distance relationship for over 3 years, we were talking about moving things forward, celebrations for my birthday etc. He did very much want things his own way and I stupidly put up with it.
He’s into porn involving 3 people, watching people have sex, different races etc and has sometimes tried to persuade me to watch it. If I don’t, I’m boring it seems.
It does nothing for me at all, I’m just into normal things.

So yesterday, whilst drinking, he sent me an explicit message about what he wanted to do with us whilst we are apart, involving a porn movie and vibrator, I told him I wasn’t interested, it upset me and was called boring. I phoned him and he hung up,
Today, we spoke again, seems I want too much of a boring relationship so it’s over. I’m surprisingly calm. I know I can do better but please help me be strong and overcome any moments of weakness!

I think you need to celebrate tonight. You've just had a great stroke of luck.

🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳 you should be doing a little dance 💃! You didn’t have to ditch the creep who had no thought for what you found comfortable.. he saved you the trouble! And any extra time wasted 🥂🥂 enjoy your freedom 💐

Believe it or not, he was in his late 50s! Not like he was some teenager just discovering porn! I’ve escaped!

Yay!

Three years wasted on this pathetic loser is more than enough. Good riddance, he's done you a massive favour.

Ugh, my skin is crawling, reading that

I think you need to take a very close look at why you have been putting up with this shit

@AnyFucker

Ugh, my skin is crawling, reading that

I think you need to take a very close look at why you have been putting up with this shit

You’re absolutely right and I hang my head in shame. I met him after coming out of a sexless marriage and was flattered that he found me attractive. I’m an intelligent woman normally but I thought all my Christmases had come at once. The cracks only started to appear after a while and slowly at that.

Please don't feel ashamed OP. It's great news that it's over.

I can imagine how heady the sexual attention and attraction would have been coming out of a relationship like you'd had.

Be kind to yourself.

@IdblowJonSnow

Please don't feel ashamed OP. It's great news that it's over.

I can imagine how heady the sexual attention and attraction would have been coming out of a relationship like you'd had.

Be kind to yourself.

Thank you x

Good riddance to a knob head

They never show their true colours straight away. It sounds like your boundaries are rather shaky though, op. Find a way to strengthen them.

Congratulations!

has sometimes tried to persuade me to watch it. If I don’t, I’m boring it seems

Fuckity bye then!

I have been married 25 years to a guy in his late 50s who is also into all this stuff multiple times a week totally behind my back (when I’m out the house) - don’t ask how I know, but I do. I often think if we split (and believe me i am saving up) that a lot of women on here would think all their Xmas had come at once— definitely not a loser type on paper, good job, decent looking and I’m sure would carefully hide his anger management issues and lack of motivation to do any housework at all for a good while — maybe some women are ok with a load of sleaze going on if other aspects make up for it, but like you OP I’m not one of them.

@tarasmalatarocks

I have been married 25 years to a guy in his late 50s who is also into all this stuff multiple times a week totally behind my back (when I’m out the house) - don’t ask how I know, but I do. I often think if we split (and believe me i am saving up) that a lot of women on here would think all their Xmas had come at once— definitely not a loser type on paper, good job, decent looking and I’m sure would carefully hide his anger management issues and lack of motivation to do any housework at all for a good while — maybe some women are ok with a load of sleaze going on if other aspects make up for it, but like you OP I’m not one of them.

Good on you saving up to split! It amazes me how men of that age are into that kind of thing, you’d think they would want happy, committed relationships as they get older. I felt like a bit of a prude but realised I had to retain my dignity and self respect. I remember going to a gym class one day whilst he was staying at mine and he got very excited thinking I was going to have sex with the instructor. 🙄

Could he be a narcissist op?
I met a guy last year, July approximately. We started chatting more in August. We met online. Swapped numbers and started texting every day. He love bombed me. Was charming, attentive, asked about my day, asked how I was what I was doing. Made me fall for his shit. Phoned and text all the time to the point of me getting irritated.
Although I enjoyed the attention I knew something was off because he never asked anything about me. He didn't even know I had kids etc, didn't ask if I was divorced and never has asked that.
It wasn't long before he stopped with the hugs and kisses talk and moved on to gross sex talk. But nasty stuff like doing it in all your holes, cumming on your face etc. He lives miles away from me. Yorkshire I'm in Devon. We have only met once and I've never slept with him. Just a kiss and he didn't hug me or show any feelings.
He still texts me, I know he's a vile creature though and does me no good what so ever. Congratulations on getting this creep out your life.

@thecatsarecrazy

Could he be a narcissist op? I met a guy last year, July approximately. We started chatting more in August. We met online. Swapped numbers and started texting every day. He love bombed me. Was charming, attentive, asked about my day, asked how I was what I was doing. Made me fall for his shit. Phoned and text all the time to the point of me getting irritated. Although I enjoyed the attention I knew something was off because he never asked anything about me. He didn't even know I had kids etc, didn't ask if I was divorced and never has asked that. It wasn't long before he stopped with the hugs and kisses talk and moved on to gross sex talk. But nasty stuff like doing it in all your holes, cumming on your face etc. He lives miles away from me. Yorkshire I'm in Devon. We have only met once and I've never slept with him. Just a kiss and he didn't hug me or show any feelings. He still texts me, I know he's a vile creature though and does me no good what so ever. Congratulations on getting this creep out your life.

Oh that’s interesting, I never even considered that. Yes, I got lots of lovey dovey texts in the beginning but interestingly he knows I have kids but has rarely asked about them in a text. He would sometimes ask how my day was or what I was up to but generally the conversation was all about him or he would quickly turn it sexual. Eg, if I was just watching tv, he would tell me to get a vibrator out instead, if I went to see a friend he would tell me to lick her etc. Not that I ever would. Just gross.

Oh that sounds exactly like him! He sometimes says what you up to today? But if I reply he doesn't actually care, doesn't respond to what I say. He knows I have kids now but doesn't ask about them, if my son starts fussing in the background if he phones me he shoots off quickly. This is disgusting but he bought me a massive dildo, after I said I didn't want it, they do nothing for me... He paid £45 for it off Lovehoney then expected videos and pictures at his demand. If we ever did sext he would finish then Text right kip now babe, night. Leaving me frustrated. When we met it was my birthday a couple of days later and he sent me a card, text me saying how he was so glad he met me.. this year birthday morning a picture of his dick. No happy birthday. I didn't respond to the picture and he was asking me y, and got the hump and told me to have a good day.
My dad is in hospital atm and he knows I'm really low. He never asks how I'm doing.