Is it ok to keep a diary?

[GrimbleDMoff]

I’m going through a tough time in my relationship at present. I have started writing a diary of all the bad things that are being done to me. Some people are saying this is the right thing to do so I have a record of everything that has happened to me but other people are saying it’s a horrible thing to do. Especially my partner.
Is it okay to keep a diary of all the bad things that are happening to me without putting in any good moments? This relationship has been abusive for some time now and there aren’t many nice things to write about.

You need to make plans to leave without telling your DP. Do you have DC, who owns the property you live in?

In a healthy relationship (even one with some issues), would not be great. But if there's abuse, you need to. If I hadn't done it, I would never have been able to leave - your brain fogs it over, and you normalise it. Looking back now, I can't believe what I let slide.

Do you mean online and password protected?
Keep doing it. You might need to remind yourself how it is when you start making plans to leave. You don't have a partner, you have an abuser.

I wouldn't have told my partner I was keeping a diary of all the horrible things they were doing to me. I would keep a record though, somewhere safe that they couldn't get to whilst I made plans to leave.

Do you have Microsoft Word? If so you can password protect a document. Call it something innocuous like Christmas presents.

It's on my phone and cloud copied them onto computer and they found it. They think I'm over sensitive and it's horrible that I'd do such a thing. They deny any of the things ave written about

@GrimbleDMoff

It's on my phone and cloud copied them onto computer and they found it. They think I'm over sensitive and it's horrible that I'd do such a thing. They deny any of the things ave written about

Not an unusual reaction from an abusive partner. Stbxh said the same when I told him I needed some space because I felt scared around him after the way he'd behaved. I was horrible for telling him that.

Of course it’s fine. They are your experiences and thoughts and if you want to record them that’s totally up to you. Obviously the abusive party is going to say it’s wrong - they wouldn’t want you leaving or telling anyone about what they are up to. It’s almost funny (in a very dark way) really how often abusive people claim that reacting to, acknowledging or voicing the abusive things they do is horrible. Like yes sure what they do is shit but the real problem is anyone knowing it.

@GrimbleDMoff

It's on my phone and cloud copied them onto computer and they found it. They think I'm over sensitive and it's horrible that I'd do such a thing. They deny any of the things ave written about

Do you think you're over sensitive? Do you think you're doing a horrible thing?e

Of course it's OK to keep a diary.

It's wrong for someone else to search for and read your private journal.

Nothing wrong with keeping a diary full stop. I kept a private blog for years. Was really helpful. Diaries are supposed to be private. No one should read them.

Use the website 750words.com for safety from prying eyes. Not backed up anywhere as far as I know and password protected. Completely private.