Messed up again

[pinkpixie83]

Yet another screw up from OLD... thought this one might have been a decent one but it appears not.

We we're seeing each other 3 times a week, getting on well... now he's gone quiet since the weekend, anyway spending the whole weekend together and having sex. Tried to arrange a date for this week... but he's full of excuses. Surprise surprise...

Is there something that makes some females only every good for one thing, because it's the story of my life.

Is there something that makes some females only every good for one thing

Vaginas and bad luck mostly.

You can keep an eye out for red flags but they don't often show that early.

Some people suggest you wait months for sex. But that's not for everyone.

Onwards and upwards..!

No there isn’t don’t start thinking like that. It just gets easier to spot the flappy red flags each time. Don’t dwell on him at all

Three times a week is a lot of time to be seeing somebody you’ve only just met. It doesn’t give them any time to miss your company and get excited about seeing you next and then the novelty wears off quickly. It also sounds a bit in the zone of “love bombing”, or trying to turn something into a relationship very quickly.

Try not taking things so fast. That doesn’t mean wait ages for sex, because that isn’t the same thing, you can have sex as early or as late as you want, but watch out for men who seem far too eager to start spending all their time with you and thinking that’s necessarily a good thing.

It's not an 'OLD screw up'. Most people you date won't end up being your long term partner, and they will get to that not-partner position by being right for you until they reveal something about them that isn't right for you. That's what dating is. That's what dating's for.

You have essentially discovered somebody who was into you for a bit and now isn't, and isn't good at saying 'Sorry but this isn't working for me.' These people are, and always have been, 10 a penny.

Just move on, and drop the 'story of my life' rhetoric. It's victim mentality. You are strong, you refuse to be treated badly, so you leave people like him lying in the dirt. No more 'poor me'.

@TheFoundations
Sometimes we are allowed to feel a bit shit about how life is going you know

[quote Limejuiceandrum]@TheFoundations
Sometimes we are allowed to feel a bit shit about how life is going you know[/quote]
'Keep feeling shit, OP' didn't seem appropriate. Nor did 'Here, have a nice placatory pat on the head', or a patronising 'Don't worry, everything will be just fine, sweety pie'.

OP is invalidating herself. She'll feel better if she validates herself. If you think that's a bad idea, post some advice of your own rather than criticising that of others.

I agree @TheFoundations - it isn't helpful to agree that the Op has somehow messed up, or is somehow unloveable, or this is going to keep happening.

Yes it's horrible when it happens, but that's what dating is like. You have a few false starts and you might be unlucky enough to come across peole who ignore you and mess you around.

You might be one of the lucky ones who only meets lovely, respectful people - great if so. But don't give up, or think it's down to you, if someone shows themselves to be a bad 'un or just not in to you.