Reading too much into his texts?

[Jenx21]

I know this is a little trivial but my partner and I have been together for 5 months. He usually texts me something really sweet every morning. He’ll text me throughout the day saying how much he misses me and will text me how many minutes it is until we get to see each other. Lots of nice things like that.
In the last maybe 2 weeks or so though he hasn’t really been texting me the same. He still texts me good morning etc but doesn’t say nice things anymore (a lot less frequently).

I brought it up and asked if there was anything wrong and he apologised and said he’s just busy with work which is fair enough but… it’s not that he’s not texting me any less it’s that the contents of the texts have changed and that’s what’s bothering me.

We only see each other once a week so this is how we communicate most of the time and the change has really upset me. I have a fearful avoidant attachment style so I’m really fighting the urge to just break it off immediately! What would you do/feel in this situation?

If that's the only thing that's changed then I'd say it's just a natural progression, no-one can keep that type of lovey dovey-ness up forever, the relationship may just becoming established

Wait it out and see what happens.
Maybe he is busy or maybe he's not that interested any more.
Or maybe it's just his normal style once the initial flush of a new relationship has worn off and it's becoming more settled.

How old are you?

I think your looking into it to much.

If hes not texting you any less and still wants to see you then dont worry.

Corny texts every minute of everyday is demanding

@Cas112
Late 20s
I know I’m being irrational, just anxious!

That type of texting is way over the top to keep going. Sounds like he is just settling down into the relationship. You are coming up to the 6 month mark where some people will step back and the initial mad love feeling/honeymoon stage begins to mellow. You need to try and manage your anxieties with this progression and try and wait it out for a bit.

@litterbird
Yeah I get that it could just be the honeymoon phase ending sadly! I just think it’s weird because we haven’t even had our first fight yet so I still feel like we’re in that lovey dovey phase still. Aah well!

It's not a bad thing at all Op if that's what's even happening, it's natural and actually means the relationship is more 'real', you'll start to see the real versions of each other, notice each other's flaws etc. If that's all it is it is fine....relax...!

I actually might take it as q good sign because all that lovey dovey crap for the first few months is utter bullshit anyway. Because no one even knows anyone that well a few months in. But now you are fitting to the 6 month mark, he might be being more real with you as that's when actual real feeling start to develop.

Omg if my partner was texting me like that all the time I think Id block him 🤮

*getting to

@Mammaaof

Omg if my partner was texting me like that all the time I think Id block him 🤮

Haha I know right

'It's 3000 minutes till I see you again. I miss you sooooo much'

Bitch please, you literally just left my house, calm the fuck down with your bullshit lol.

Love-bombed at the beginning, now the novelty has worn off. Beware of sickly sweetness at the start - and counting down the minutes is about as cheesy as it gets, should be enough to put most people off, despite you holding it up as a good sign

Nobody's got time to be doing that all the time. Maybe at the start of a relationship but after that, no. Of course it's going to dwindle, especially if you are busy.

@Mammaaof it actually made me so uncomfortable because I’m not particularly affectionate but now that he doesn’t do it I feel like there’s something wrong with me lol.

[quote Jenx21]@Mammaaof it actually made me so uncomfortable because I’m not particularly affectionate but now that he doesn’t do it I feel like there’s something wrong with me lol.[/quote]
Surely that should have been a bigger red flag.

I agree with pp that he may be a love bomber similar that is now blowing cold. Read up on the signs just incase. As well as how to spot a narcissist when dating.

But op if someone's texts are making you uncomfortable and instead of saying something or deciding you are not compatable you find yourself letting it slide, then you need to ask yourself - why?

And the reason narcissust love bombers blow cold is to make you feel 'not enough' and make you worry about the state of the relationship.

@Pinkbonbon
Definitely a couple of signs of love bombing after reading a bit about it. Yikes

[quote Jenx21]@Pinkbonbon
Definitely a couple of signs of love bombing after reading a bit about it. Yikes[/quote]
Oh dear.

Be careful. He may be dropping the mask now

Always trust your gut if you feel uncomfortable with q persons behaviour. It's trying to tell you something.

Remember that your feelings are valid. And that if someone is not compatable with you, you do not have to change yourself in order to make them fit. Because that's no way to go through life.

And if it comes to it - you don't need to justify a break up or get his permission for one. And simply 'this isn't working for me' or 'I'm just not feeling it' are good enough reason to give, without further explanation.

Going to go against the grain here, but my gut has never been wrong on this stuff. You can sense changes and whether they mean something usually. Five months is nothing (and it's a bit odd you're calling him a partner after such a short space of time, almost like you're trying to rush it into something more serious than it is?), and I'd expect you still to both be head over heels with one another. If that's how he behaves at the start when it's all fresh and new and he's trying to put his best foot forward I'd be surprised at such a drastic change so soon.

I don't usually advocate game playing, but maybe dial it back a little, see how it goes. Make sure you're busy sometimes when he asks to see you and that he pre plans dates in the diary if that isn't happening. By all means be exclusive with him but don't go along with grand statements about the future or intensity/depth of feelings when it's so early. Hang back a little and save something of yourself for you. See how it goes. It's been five months, if he's losing interest it's no great loss, you're just dating.

@Pinkbonbon thank you. Looks like I’ve got some thinking to do.

@SoyLatte2Shots I wouldn’t read into my terminology too closely. Partner/boyfriend, same thing where I’m from lol.
Yes the change took me by surprise and we haven’t even fought about anything yet so I would think that we would still be in the head over heels stage too.
We don’t really talk about the future or deep feelings or anything of that nature. Unfortunately for me we’re in Sydney and still in a strict lockdown so I have no excuse other than work to be busy lol but I will definitely be pulling back a bit I think