Me and OH together for nearly twenty years. Always envisioned a mid sized wedding but year upon year put off by an okay year with OH’s family followed by a bad one, continual pattern.
Never took the plunge with eloping even though it looks like the most drama free solution but been held back from regretting it and feeling as though my ‘ideal’ day has been taken away or as if they have ‘won’ and it will confirm their view that I’m a bad apple.
However, it’s just got to top he stage where honestly, far too many family members really must have mental health or personality disorder issues and how can I really have a hold on that on our wedding day without being filled with fear and anxiety?
Then there’s the dark cloud that might be exploded when OH family do find out we eloped and they make us feel bad for it (even though they were probably relieved to not go to our wedding).
Just in constant limbo and we cannot move forward with our relationship at all. Please help. Has anyone eloped with similar circumstances and did you tell the ‘problem family’ beforehand or at least suggest you would do, to soften any fall outs?
I know that sounds ridiculous but OH was even made to feel bad for not suggesting he was going to propose to me. He just wanted to keep is intimate between us and really tradition dictates that he should just ask my father.. so not sure why they thought they had the right to be ‘in’ on it.
Ahhhhhhghhhh!