How do I get over him?

[Gem8701]

I broke up with my ex in march after a 5 yr relationship, we have a little girl together. At the time i did think breaking up was a good idea but have since regretted it and tried to reconcile, he does not want this.

My question is how can i get over it - i still have to see him every week ( dropping and picking up little one) and i still have to converse with him.

I currently talk to him on whatsapp and see him online A LOT which makes me think hes moved on and it is breaking my heart as he was the love of my life. How do i move on while still being able to coparent?

It's still very fresh and raw so you must be kind to yourself. Try to resist the urge to look at when he's online - I know it's difficult but with practice, you might find it easier to say what you have to say and that's it. Obviously your little girl's well being comes first and it's best for everyone to really focus positively on what she needs most from you both as her parents under the circumstances. Also focus on the things you like to do, things that make you happy, however small, basically invest the time in yourself and allow yourself to grieve, this is important as well and hopefully you will have a better frame of mind that makes the break up less painful. It will take time, there's no short cut but I promise it will be worth it when you finally feel lighter and more able to cope with co parenting and taking care of yourself as well.

I think in future make a point of only communicating about your daughter. If you can't do that straight off the bat then work on dealing back contact bit by bit.

It might be wise to come off social media if you find yourself checking his profile too much.

You could also block him on everything except a burner phone. And only check that phone once per day.

Essentially, it's up to you to set boundaries - for yourself.

*dialing back contact

Why did you break up?

You will get there but you need to set some boundaries for yourself. First up, change your settings on whatsapp to not show your status. That way he won’t see his either & won’t spiral if you go detective.

Make a list of things you don’t miss too. The pettier the better. You ended it for a reason.

You will get through this.