Relationship Breakdown Advice

[MBeen]

Just looking for a bit of advice from people who have been in a similar position. When you're eager to end a relationship for numerous reasons including their cheating etc but there's a child involved, where do you even start?! If youre about to become a single parent how do you sort childcare, work, moving, everything else, with almost no support network? How do you even leave or get them to leave? I've tried to end the relationship before but he wont leave. He turns nasty, or turns on the tears and forces me to crippling guilt. Then we just pretend it didnt happen. Has anyone with a young child had to leave a partner? I dont know how to start.

Really sorry you're going through this but also, sounds like you're making positive steps to get out of a bad situation. My brains a bit frazzled as I've decided enough is enough for me too tonight and told him. OH isn't abusive but he won't do anything to help our relationship, he closes down or we argue (and pretend it didn't happen)! We have a 14 month old and he's a great dad but hasn't been much of a partner since we had him. Anyway sorry, I just wanted to give you a virtual hug and to wish you all the best.... you can do this, life will be so much easier without him. He sounds selfish and manipulative.

When I was a single mum before this relationship I was able to get 70% off childcare fees, single person council tax reduction, you might also be entitled to help depending on how much you earn. Ring your council offices next week re council housing, the rent is so much cheaper just probably a long waiting list, but would depend on your situation. All the best to you

I left my ex when DS was 2.5 years.

I had a job at that time (still on probation, minimum wage). Found a rental nearby I could afford, pretty old, nothing fancy but a good start. We split the nursery cost in half, as well as the overall responsibility (50/50). Initially I was living month to month on a strict budget, worked hard, got promoted and it got easier. I couldn't apply for benefits where I used to live - but if I could, I definitely would have.

Later on, ex moved away for work and I became a full time single parent. He contributed minimally (financially) but I've learned how to manage my money so it lasts. I considered courts and getting a bigger contribution from him but courts = money that I didn't have, and I didn't want us to become enemies for our son's sake.

It was hard, especially in the beginning, but it was worth it. The peace of mind, the freedom, the relief (he did not treat me well but adored his son). Best decision I've made.

It depends on your dynamics, no two situations and people are the same. I'm sorry you're going through this and I wish you strength to do what's best for you and your baby.

Just to add to the above - I also didn't have any support network or family around as I lived abroad, but I met some great people through mother and toddlers group and made friends with other single parents (met them in parks etc.). I understand that having no family around adds to the difficulty but it doesn't make it impossible :)