Just been dumped

[Armanok]

18 months together. He’s been getting more and more distance, the old “act like a prick and pretend there’s nothing wrong” tactic

Called him out on it tonight and got a “yes you’re right I don’t want to be in a relationship right now” response back

Well fuck you too mister

By text. I’m nearly 40 and I got dumped by text, have some fucking class at least

So sorry to hear this, but he sounds like a twat so you're better off out of it.

Tough to read

He sounds a bit half hearted so although it hurts (I know!) it doesn't sound like he was the man of anybody dreams.

I was ghosted when I was 46 by a man of 55. There is no age limit on cowardly communication :-/.

xx

Well tbf at least you called it.

I hope you just replied 'fair enough, I'm not feeling it anymore anyway'.

Poor you. Wine and chocolate this weekend.

Then style it out and move on. You're way better off being single than being treated badly as part of a couple.

How awful for you and what a shitty, cowardly way for him to do it. How long was he being a dick to you before you called him on it? At least softened the blow by showing himself to be a bit of prick beforehand so I hope you’re not hurting too much.

I’m sorry @Armanok. It’s an awful feeling.

At least it wasn’t a PostIt note. If that’s the best he can do you are better off without him. Not that it makes it any easier.

If you "called him out on it" by text, how did you expect him to respond? Drive over and have the conversation?

Don't start text exchanges you don't want to have an actual outcome to. Have these discussions face to face.

I called him and spoke to him. He said he wasn’t able to have a conversation and was exhausted.

Ten mins after that he text and said “yes your right, I don’t want a relationship at the moment, I’m sorry”

@Armanok

That sounds brutal but to be honest as much as it hurts at least he has been honest and now you know. (Not that anyone should get a rosette for just being honest!)
So now you know you can grieve it and then heal.
You will be just fine, I promise. and xx

And sorry I didn't mean for that to sound unfeeling, believe me I know it feels shit x

@Armanok

I called him and spoke to him. He said he wasn’t able to have a conversation and was exhausted.

Ten mins after that he text and said “yes your right, I don’t want a relationship at the moment, I’m sorry”

What an absolute coward and dickhead.

Might not feel it right now, but you are better off without him.

There is just something about the 18 month mark. I personally think it's the telling time, as up until then it's easier to hide or mask things.

For me, if a relationship sails past a year and a half then it looks more promising.

Just to add, I broke up with exdp (also of 18 months) via message. As its the only way I could get what I wanted to say across without being cut off mid sentence or him being ultra dramatic by crying etc.

I wouldn't be in a rush to reply to him though OP.

@WatieKatie

I’m sorry *@Armanok*. It’s an awful feeling.

At least it wasn’t a PostIt note. If that’s the best he can do you are better off without him. Not that it makes it any easier.

Has someone actually been dumped by a Post It Note???

@Armanok

I called him and spoke to him. He said he wasn’t able to have a conversation and was exhausted.

Ten mins after that he text and said “yes your right, I don’t want a relationship at the moment, I’m sorry”

And he doesn't know the difference between your and you're!!!!

Silence is dignity. Don't enter into any further discussion with him, ever. Do not respond to him, ever.

Just sail peacefully out of his life, and look after yourself.

I'm 42 and have just been ghosted by a 53 year old. There's no age limit on cowardice, in fact an older man with no serious previous relationships is far more likely to lack the backbone/emotional intelligence to give it to you straight.

I agree. The man who did it to me had never stuck with a relationship which i knew was a red flag. He'd gpt a woman knocked up at 19 and abandoned her but felt like some kind of hero for having paid some maintenance. Then he had a long term partner and 2 kids but wouldnt marry her. She threw him out. It was her house. He tried to get a mortgage and couldnt and he was very bitter and angry and made digs that i had a mortgage. But he was dating somebody 9 years younger(me) who'd been left in no doubt she needed to sort out her own life!! I had applied when i was much younger. At my age he was cock lodging.

His previous partner had wanted him to commit, get married, pay mortgage, get work done on the house and he wanted to stay footloose and fancy free despite their dc, and then in his esrly 50s only ten did he get bitter he couldnt get a mortgage.

I had worried my way through my 30s but yet he was really resentful of me i think, that in fact despite seeeming modest and poor, i was better set up.

I would never miss so many red flags again.