I feel as if I am turning into a pretty unpleasant person and I could really do with some help, support and guidance.
I live with DP and our baby. I’ve recently gone back to work after a period on maternity leave. Having a baby hasn't all been plain sailing: was born just before the third lockdown so had a pretty miserable time of it to start with. However, as the months went by and the weather improved and things opened I’ve been fairly busy and active, made lots of new friends and so on.
But now … so many things which have bothered me for a long time but I’ve managed to contain have really started to drive me mad.
I get so irritated with DP. If I need something, he just doesn’t do it. He doesn’t refuse: he says he will and then vanishes or he gets tied up in something else. And it’s made me realise how resentful I still am - when we had the baby I remember actually being hungry because I kept asking him to go to the supermarket and he just didn’t. I had to ask over and over and it was hours later he went. These days I don’t bother; I go myself, and he’ll eventually go. It pisses me off so much.
We are supposed to be selling the house and buying a new one together. Paid a mortgage broker, got that all sorted. I’ve now realised that this won’t happen, and I can’t understand why he went along with it.
Then yesterday he booked a holiday for us at new year so presumably he isn’t thinking of leaving me.
We have virtually no quality time so finding the time to talk about these issues is hard. And also I’m a bit worried about unleashing months of pent up frustration over minor but very frustrating things.
I do think I have some PND lingering too which I wonder is impeding my ability to see things clearly.
Can anyone help?