Staying over with FWB

[LadySilence]

Ok, here's the situation. Recently out of a long term relationship that was platonic for the last few years. Have the opportunity in a few weeks to go and stay with a very lovely male friend in another city- this will almost certainly involve the benefits type situation! Have never been to his before and although I know him well we've never spent a huge amount of time together. I really want to go and can't afford to stay in a hotel. However this all feels a bit terrifying-
-Haven't had sex in years, possibly forgotten how it works and what the current acceptable body standard is
-Morning panda eyes and booze breath
-The horrors of having to poo in someone else's small flat

Help!

Oh @LadySilence .. guess what !
He also has to have a poo now and then
He'll also have morning breath and bed hair and is probably as anxious as you
Just be yourself- relax and do what ever makes you comfortable !

Not that I would ever advocate it , you can now start planning hair nails waxing underwear nightwear and anything makes you feel fabulous

All bodies are the acceptable body standard! I'm pretty sure (?) he already knows what you look like so there won't be any shocks there, and sex really is like riding a bike. You never forget!

Take your makeup off before you go to bed to avoid morning panda eyes and just brush your teeth as soon as you can. My experience with men is that they care very little what they look like/smell like in the morning so at least if you smell he probably will too.

Now before you go, buy some nice new underwear and pamper yourself so you feel good. Good luck!

You need to think twice about entering such a rdlationship. This FWB scenario often ends in tears

Thanks both! It's just nerve wracking as my previous relationship was nearly ten years and the last few of those we were just friends so I feel decidedly out of practice with all this! I'll be staying two nights and a bit worried about not having my own space but a hotel was unaffordable unfortunately. He's a lovely bloke and totally non judgemental but I suppose we're all our worst critics!

I think it is very casual and a bit of fun for both of us, I'm certainly not wanting anything more after such a long relationship. Plus he lives the other end of the country so we won't be seeing each other all that much!

If anything, just use it as practise!

Hope you have a lovely time!

I wouldn't want to put myself in that situation with someone where I had no where to go in a different city if it didn't work out. It's unnecessarily making yourself vulnerable.

Fair enough if you had been sleeping with him before or maybe knew his place and the area and had money to stay elsewhere if needs be. But as is, no, it's not a good idea (understatement if the centuary).

I do know the area very well and have lots of good trusted friends there so not a problem if things did get weird. I don't think that's likely though. We get on incredibly well and there will be absolutely no pressure to 'do' anything.

You clearly see this for what it is; fun! Too many of us forget what it’s like to have fun. You know him and you trust him. Have a lovely time.

Close your (maybe panda) eyes and relax.

Smart females carry condoms! Put some in your bag, in case he is not prepared.

Oh, and best knickers!

Make up wipes to remove make up before bed - no panda eyes

Condoms - no 'I don't have any' issues

Chewing gum - on the bedside table if you feel self conscious in the morning

Don't drink so much you'll have a hangover and feel like shit / get the fear the next day

Enjoy!

Has he offered to have you stay ?

Ooh I don't know.. 2 nights is a big commitment. Could you go to stay with one of your friends in the city if you need to?

I'm surprised I said that as I generally make very bad decisions when it come to things like this! I suppose it's because I can see myself doing something like this and it ending horribly

To avoid stinking out the bathroom, flush the poop away before you wipe, then flush again once wiping has ceased. If you smoke, take a lighter in with you, lighting it over the toilet bowl once you have risen...

Oh and don't forget those poop sprays ! They are really good ! I think you spray before or after I don't really know as I live on my own but I have one sitting out in case a visitor which I don't actually have often lol feels the need
VI Poo or something ?

He has offered to have me stay yes. I don't think I'd need to stay with any other friends but it's good to know they're there! He is very lovely and I think we'll just enjoy hanging out together. Good idea on the anti smell stuff!