Help me get him out of my mind

[Peppapigforlife]

I'm a single mum to a toddler with a lot of time on my hands at home.

When my ex boyfriend whom I hadn't seen in 2.5 years got in touch and said he regretted breaking up with me and that he had tried to find me ever since (I left the country we were in and changed my phone number and he didn't know), it felt like too good to be true.

But now there's little naggly things which make me think he is lying to me (which are too deep to go into), and now we are back in touch it seems like he isn't that bothered about making the effort he did when he was trying to win me back last week.

Now I just want to focus on myself and forget him, but I'm struggling to think of how, when I'm indoors all evening or having to take my phone with me when I take her to toddler groups and such.

It's true, I haven't been as happy as I was with him since we broke up, and I have thought about him most days since, but I've made loads of new hobbies and habits to keep me going. Now I'm finding it quite hard to find even more new things to take my mind off his fresh arrival, in the confines of my limited life.

Oh and my friends are all super busy living their best lives now that lockdown is over and making up for lost time, so they don't have time to chat or hang out and take my mind off things.

Just think you were fine without him and will be just fine again in future, it's far worse to have the stress of someone lying to you and the disappointment of the lack of effort he's making.
I know it can be lonely on your own, I'm in the same situation but I would rather be alone than with a false person.
If he can only make an effort for one week then that shows he isn't serious.

@seensome that's true, I guess I have to sit with the loneliness feeling rather than fight it

I don't know if I should speak with him to end the push pull situation. It's like he seems to sense when I'm having doubts and need a proper chat about things and that's the time he doesn't answer the phone. (This is what the problem was last time). And then he will text me the next day or hours later asking me how I am and I will have forgotten the doubt and start talking to him again.