Men can be heartless b**tards

[ChrisMartin67]

Just that really....you open your heart and let them in for them to be unemotional available.
Really liked him too.

... and so can women be

@BIWI

... and so can women be

Ffs just let the op have her moment, I'm sure she isn't so dense not to know that!

@ChrisMartin67

Just that really....you open your heart and let them in for them to be unemotional available. Really liked him too.

Your well rid of the frog then, big hugs, then onwards and upwards xxxx

You're not your!!!

It's human nature to be selfish which can go hand in hand with being heartless. Men and women alike are both more than capable to be heartless. I've found usually in different ways though when it comes to relationships.

Would you like to talk about it? Or tell us how you've reached the conclusion he is "emotionally unavailable"?

He was there for me alot .but would never tell me how he felt.
There was a' connection ' but I feel his head was elsewhere.

@ChrisMartin67

Just that really....you open your heart and let them in for them to be unemotional available. Really liked him too.

But the key is to not let them in

Until they have demonstrated that they add value to your life, are emotionally available and have kind qualities- no text ping pong, no sex and no headspace.

@Suprima
That's God advice thank you

@ChrisMartin67

He was there for me alot .but would never tell me how he felt. There was a' connection ' but I feel his head was elsewhere.

"would never tell me how he felt" "his head was elsewhere"

I'm so sorry you're hurting, OP, but this is also on you because you ignored two very clear indicators of what he was capable of.

SuprimaI
Great advice
And I don’t follow it so great! People can be horny and lonely , which impacts great decision making I find !!

I’m sorry you are hurting Op
You have done well to get out of a negative situation
But I’m sure you are feeling sad and heartbroken 💔

Interesting subject, thanks for sharing. And some good advice about no headspace, sex etc. Sorry you've been hurt, but try and see it as a blessing in disguise and you do deserve better x

Have a read of Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl.

You are also emotionally unavailable which is why you pick men the same - the book is really good and described me to a tee even though I brought it to better understand my boyfriend, I never imagined I was part of the problem.

I know that I'm part of the problem! But thanks for the recommendation. Basically I've settled for less than I should have. My counsellor has managed to get this through to me.

The thing is a lot of them are emotionally unaware and selfish: I’ve learned to brush off the stupid comments .. they think with a different side of their brain to females.

Yes, l second reading My Unavailable, and why women are drawn to them.
We have to own our choices.
I am having a very long, verging on almost permanent, break from dating and l have to say l feel a lot better for it. Sometimes it does you good to focus on yourself and your peace of mind. It can be a beautiful space, being alone.
I hope you look after yourself ,and find what ever it is your looking for.

@BIWI

... and so can women be

Yes true except when omen are bastard it usually doesn’t result in the man being left as a single parent , raped , having revenge porn against them, battered or worse ! Thank goodness that’s not the case here but I think many people miss the point that mens bad behaviours on the whole had far more devastating results for women overall

@Lightlady

"I think many people miss the point that mens bad behaviours on the whole had far more devastating results for women overall"

That's absolutely true. But nothing to do with what the OP posted.

[quote BIWI]@Lightlady

"I think many people miss the point that mens bad behaviours on the whole had far more devastating results for women overall"

That's absolutely true. But nothing to do with what the OP posted.[/quote]
It IS very much to do with the false equivalency given by your statement that ‘women can be bastards too ‘

Like I said , it doesn’t seem the case that there abuse in this particular case but when people come back with statements such as yours implying oh well women are the same , it should be noted that no , it absolutely very often isn’t the same and doesn’t have the same outcome