No reply needed, need to get this out.

[Imissyouxxx]

They say the only way to move on is to forgive. I'm not sure I forgive you just yet, I miss you everyday though. I find it so hard to comprehend what I felt wasn't reciprocated or even real. I think I fell in love with your fake persona. I couldn't comprehend how you acted and that what you said wasn't real.

The dreams have stopped now - they were torture and a constant reminder of what I can't have so I'm pleased about that.

No one prepared me for the immense hurt I felt when I lost you, you were like a physical craving to me....I cried for so very long.

To me you were my best friend, I've never cared about a man as much as I did you...I would have done anything to allow you to smile, even if that was without me.

I'm sorry you never felt the same, I've felt like I'm crazy a lot of the time, I probably am.

I've left you alone which has been hell, I know you don't feel the same. Thankyou for teaching me about myself...it's been a self reflecting experience. Thankyou for allowing me to feel love...I didn't think I could. I did with you - I'm sorry I wasn't what you wanted.

Much love to you always amd I miss you more than you will ever know. I love you - be happy x

I hope you’re happy now and if not you soon will be. You sound very self aware.

Thank you...that's sweet. I think I am self aware but it doesn't make it any easier unfortunately xx

I'm actually crying now.

Sounds like I could've written it myself.

Now I'm crying. 😔

💪 wonderful women

It does hurt less in time. My ex was my world. I didn't understand why he didn't want to fight for us.

Time has passed. I don't care so much now. He has behaved badly since and I haven't forgiven him. I don't need too. I live my life he lives his. He is just someone I use to know.

This is so beautifully written. I am 1 week into being heartbroken and not in this headspace yet but want to be.

Gosh, this could have been written by me. We broke up earlier this year after 5 years together when he told me he'd never been in love with me. It's definitely got easier, it's six months now, but I wouldn't say I'm there yet. Like you, the dreams were torture, although they've lessened now. Take care and stay strong.

So beautifully written. I joined mumsnet tonight in a vain effort to try and forget someone who never really cared about me but who I fell for so deeply. The pain makes me feel sick. I'm sure you relate. The ache. The terrible unending longing, especially difficult when you absolutely know there will never be a happy ending.

The heart takes time to accept what the head already knows. Give it that time. I am... and, day by day I forget his face a little more. I dont think of his smile quite so much. I dont replay our kisses and feel quite the same devastation quite as often. He visits my dreams less. I cry less. But I want him, every day of my life, in every single way there is to want a person. I've never loved someone so very much. Ironically it is my own doing he is out of my life and has been for 6 months. I told him no more. I blocked him. Despite the love I felt, self worth ultimately ruled and if he couldn't love me back, i couldn't go on being in his life and having him in mine. So close... yet, so fucking desperately far.

I think I fell in love with your fake persona

This is the hard bit, the person you have those feelings for doesn't exist and it's hard to get your head around it. I'm so sorry you are going through this, it's so painful at the time but you will get over it x

Thanks for your lovely words. .@Sonaftersonafterson similar position here, I kind of finished it in the end as I felt so low down his list and it was crippling me.

I dreamt I was with him last night, after saying the dreams had stopped.

@EggAndHasBeans I'm trying to remember he isn't real, not the part I loved anyway. It hurts.