Can anyone shed some light on why I’m feeling this way

[Lalalalalala67]

Been with my husband for 10 years with 2 children. We’ve had our fair share of ups and downs like any other couple/marriage.

He works away a lot usually for 6 weeks at a time, then home for around 5 weeks.

When he’s due home I dread it, get upset and wish he would stay away at work for longer. I’ve also been close a few times to ending things because I don’t feel like I want to be with him.

When he’s at home, most of the time I’m happy and we get along.

I just don’t understand why I dread so much him coming home, but when he’s actually home I’m OK.

Sounds like you just enjoy your own space and company.

I dont think I'd want a bloke in my home space after 6 weeks with it to myself.

Might be you realise you've outgrown him. And although you are comfortable with him, it's just not what you need anymore.

Hey OP, perhaps his return makes you confront your ambivalence about your marriage? Though you might end up getting along once he's actually home, it sounds like a part of you is unsure that's enough?

I had similar when mine worked away (Monday to Friday for 5 years). I worked out it was because Mon- Fri I had my own routines, did not have to consider any other adult and when he was home I had to change my mindset. Doing this on a regular basis was not good for either of us. After 5 years we decided he’d change the way he worked and he stopped going away during the week. It was a very good decision for our marriage and looking back we wished we’d never done the whole working away thing.

You need to work out if the relationship isn’t working or if it’s the working away from home which isn’t working.