I'm 50, is 62 too old for me to date?

[mrspainful]

Just dipped my toe in OLD and have been talking with a 62 year old. I find him physically attractive from the photos. He's really keen to meet for coffee. But my friend says he's too old for me.

It's not just the numbers, we are at very different stages of our lives. I have primary aged children as I started having babies late in life. He's got adult children. He seems lovely but I'm just not sure.

Definitely meet. I met a guy i had great hopes for, he was only 60 to my 52 which wouldn't in itself put me off, but his only interesting conversation was about his grandchildren, whereas ds is still at school. They sounded fab and it was a fun date but no particular attraction and no hard feelings. Men on the whole won't say 'you're too fat', either you are both attracted or you're not.

I'm 49 and divorcing my DH who is 61, our youngest is 11, age wasn't the main reason but I've enjoyed dating guys who are ten years younger than me, also interested in one who is 59, it's the person not their age that's important

This is why I can't do OLD.
I would have no interest in that way in a man 12 years older than I am. Unless he was Brad Pitt. But I bet he's not.

It's not actually compulsory to meet anyone from OLD! Newish bf was 54 to my 51 and life stage is pretty identical.

In the nicest possible way, you're 50. You're allowed to make your own mind up, you don't need your friend's permission. Just meet for a coffee and see what you feel like.

Just meet, you may like him, you may not. Don’t spend time chatting online, it frequently builds up a false intimacy which disappears when you meet.

In short no not too old!!

He's just saying what he thinks I want to hear to get me to meet him

He could easily be lying about his age too; many on OLD do, so that 62 could well be 72 and he "made a typo"

If age is an issue you might want to check that. Obviously you can't ask for a birth certificate but there are other ways, including trusting your eyes and instinct

My neighbour is 60 and his wife is late 40s. They have teenagers but he is so full of life. They do a lot of walking, camping and travelling. I think at that age they are either boring stay at home, or realise what is important in life and know that there may not be many more years before it is difficult to do so, so make the most of it.

However, I wouldn't want to date anyone with primary school aged kids and mine are in secondary school!

I wouldn't, unless you both want a short term fling. An actual relationship is hard at this stage of your lives. He is likely to retire in the next few years and want to spend a lot more time with you. You are likely to still be working and still have a dependant child.

I wouldn't settle for this. I appreciate you are at the start, but you date and then it turns into a less than ideal relationship. I would only date people that aren't a no for a long term relationship even if wanting a brief relationship because you risk getting involved and settling for someone who isn't right for you because you have got involved.

"I find him physically attractive from the photos."

Are you sure these photos are recent ones? Quite common for people to use older ones!

I wouldn't but I have the opposite problem. I'm mid forties but not attracted to men my age or older. At all. But younger guys are just looking for a fling. Frustrating.

Go for a coffee. You have nothing to lose. And it has nothing to do with your friend! Is she jealous or something?

As PP have said, life stages can hinder 'living together'-type relationships. But you're a long way from that even being an issue, given that you've never met him yet.

I do know I would never, ever even have a coffee with a man with young children, however attractive he might be, because I absolutely do not want to go back to that stage of life, having just achieved freedom after 20+ years of being solely Mummy.