need an advice

[florin93]

Hello , me and my gf had a big argument last week , i found out she was texting with someone , it was nothing and belive her , in the past i did same thing.. so now she become so cold , she say she still love me , i belive that too but i dont know how to act , i love her like crazy and im afraid i ll become cold like her and thats means ending , my mistake now is i become a bit paranoid and suspicious , she change her privacy settings in whatsapp , it was just a notice from me , i asked her why , tried to talk with her and she said because of me , im afraid to talk about sensitive stuff like who was that on your phone etc...even if is a simple friend ,im just low and sad and i dont want to show her because its nothing anymore and i notice she s annoyed if im like that , but cant be fake , cant help to not show my feelings
im thinking about break up , she told me she want days ago but i tried to convince her , there are chances and since then its bad , like this reliation falling apart , any advice please ? sorry for long text and my english , thanks for listen me

The big question before we go any further is. Were you sitting next to her when she was texting someone. What in the text message made you think oh she is being inappropriate. Or was she being sneaky about it?

I only ask because I do have two ex flings who lasted a few days but we remained friends because I was back packing at the time. My partner knows that he can go on my phone anytime and I never restrict access to it. If he wonders who someone is I'm talking to I tell him.

Being secretive naturally makes someone think you're doing something wrong.

It's also possible that you over reacted for no reason to someone knew. I do still find it odd though that she changed her privacy settings. Are there any red flags, does she make less effort with you, see you less, or feel distant?

yeah feel her distant , and the only time when she text with me was after i found she cheat...i cant even said cheat it was just text , and that almost destroyed me cuz i really didnt though she can text with someone else in that way i cryed like a baby and after 1h she received a text and she respond back , same guy so thats the main reason i ask , if she did that after how i can expect to feel the same for me

and yeah i admit i over reacted , no excused but i acted by my feelings

Hello OP
Sorry to hear about your problems.
Sadly, in my experience/knowledge, being secretiveness about your mobile, laptop etc means one thing and one thing only = cheating.

I'm not saying your GF is cheating, only she knows the truth.

It's a tricky situation. Often cheats will play on the fact you don't trust them and they drove you to it.

Like I said it's hard all round.

Have you noted any other changes like, EG, going out a bit more, staying out a bit more, working longer hours even if 30 mins or so and meeting up with a so-called friend more than usual because their so-called friend is feeling low etc? If not, then I feel nothing is going on but if she remains cold, IMHO there is a reason that equates to more than just her being upset by your actions.

Your choice, ask her outright by saying how you feel, apologise and ask her to be open and honest if she wants to move on as deciet hurts a lot more the longer it carrys on.

Bottom line your choice. Poss ask your parents what they think and all good parents will never tell anyone if you asked them not to where as so-called friends do

I hope it works out for you and it will one way or another.

Good luck.

ps - you are young I'm safely guessing, so sort it out as you do not deserve it and if gf feels she is too good for you, trust me, you are tooooooo good for her.

ok , we have a son , my step son but love him like mine and i know that she know that thats the only thing for sure , so she say bad things about his dad, dont blame her but its not my problem to say nothing , and 2 days ago found out she sent him a pic of our sex toys...im so embarresed saying that , but it was feeling wrong and after a big argument i ask her her phone she said no , i just ask her to test it , i never watch on her phone or i will its like her purse but the day after i was feeling low and sad and she offered me her phone to stop this and overreact but look she could delete or hide a lot of things anyway im trying to say it like big red flag for me

ps: im 28 she s 24 , when she met she was saying im too good for her , saddly i think im changed and maybe im not to good for her , thanks for reply

Hi , there and I am new here then can you help me with something and I will tell you about my love life then and I had just broke up with my ex boyfriend last January then before valentine day and I still got feelings for him and I still love him and I can`t stop thinking about him then and my other friends said to me that I should go back out with my ex boyfriend then and who advice me to do it then. xx

@katherineduffy27

Hi , there and I am new here then can you help me with something and I will tell you about my love life then and I had just broke up with my ex boyfriend last January then before valentine day and I still got feelings for him and I still love him and I can`t stop thinking about him then and my other friends said to me that I should go back out with my ex boyfriend then and who advice me to do it then. xx

to be honest i never been to your stage but if you feel thats the right thing go for it ,but at first sign of doing wrong decision , step back for your own sake , thats all i can advice