Together 11 months, exclusive all this time. Said I love you. See each other a few nights a week. In contact daily even if a brief text. All good, have a great time together.
He’s had a few 6 month things but I am now his longest relationship. I’ve been in longer relationships of a few years, lived with the person etc. I’ve found him a bit..amusing sometimes with his approach, at the start he was quite awkward and could be nervous. That’s obviously changed now and we are relaxed around each other.
I feel like I’m managing the relationship. It’s me who suggests when we meet, what we do etc. I’ve left it many times and 9/10 times he will be in touch to ask if I’m free (a question I find odd after so many months together..I’d have told him in advance if I had plans at the weekend etc). Anyway, he will get in touch eventually about plans but it is last minute, he doesn’t ever seem to have any ideas of doing something together unless I ask directly, then he will suggest something he’d like to do.
I’ve also wanted to go away for the weekend for a while now and he is rubbish at booking time off work. Last weekend I said clearly that I didn’t want to have to ask again and I would like him to come back to me with a couple of dates he’s booked off so we can plan a trip - a trip he says he really wants to do…. So far again this week despite being in touch he’s not mentioned booking it off. I don’t want to ask again but also don’t want to be in a relationship where we never do these things. He places a lot of blame on work , he’s a partner at a big law firm and does work late and it’s unpredictable but I also work in professional services and I’m not an idiot, I know he can sort this if he prioritised it.
It’s odd because we spend a lot of time together really…it’s not like he has some secret life or he doesn’t say how much he loves seeing me when we are together. I feel happy and secure when we are together which is often, but apart I feel like it’s me managing things.
I don’t know if this is my insecurity or his failing? The relationship is really great aside from this but it bothers me.