How long to meet kids etc?

[40somethingJBJ]

After almost 8 years alone (with not so much as a date), I’ve started seeing someone and it’s going really well. We live a fair distance apart, but both happy to travel, and this is always on a weekend when my 15yo son is at his dad’s.

I’m not planning on it yet, but it’s been an awfully long time since I’ve been in this situation, so what kind of timescale do I put on telling my teenager I’ve met someone and maybe introducing them? Last time I was with anyone long term, he was a lot younger and just accepted them as mum’s friend, but it’s been just me and him for a long time now.

I think around 6 months if still going well no arguments etc, if you've only just started seeing him then you haven't got to know him well enough, I think 6 months is when reality sets in a bit more and you can judge if you see it as a long term relationship.
There really isn't any rush to, just when you think it's appropriate.

He's 15..
Well old enough to respect you need a life too.
Casual meet then await feedback...

I think the standard Mumsnet response will say wait 6 months or more.
Personally I think you will just know when it's right.
I told my teenagers about a new man after I'd only been dating him a couple of months - waited about 5 months before we introduced each others kids. We were both pretty sure about each other and over a year later we've just had our fist holiday all together and relationship is going great.

I would be honest with ds now, tell him you have met someone you like a lot, you don't know if it will be long term but you are very happy and you would love him to meet him when he's ready - your son might be keen to meet straight away or prefer to wait a while. I introduced my older teens straight away, they never slept at their dads place (very close so no need) why be secretive

I told my adult dc after a fortnight of furtively sneaking around and feeling dishonest. . They gave him The Seal of Approval and ok-ed him meeting the younger ones... It was them who wanted him there for Xmas after knowing him a few weeks!
9 years in now and still all good!!

I took about a year but mine were much younger (6 and 8) so were much more reliant on me and it was important to me that the relationship was secure before any introductions happened. At 15 though I’d be less cautious. They’d be a lot less interested if it happened now, for a start!

Might as well tell him now, just that you're dating someone. It's not like your telling the lad he has a new step dad or anything. As soon as you've decided to commit to an actual relationship, beyond just 'dating' then offer your son to meet him. I don't believe in keeping it a secret, with older kids at least. Otherwise when you do finally introduce him, for your son it'll feel like going from 0 to 100mph in an instant.