Bored in relationship

[Wmbuhb]

I’ve been in a relationship with my partner for two years, and a large percentage of this time, I’ve been extremely bored of being with him and I feel extremely guilty for this. As he is a such a nice guy he’d do absolutely anything for me and is crazy about me! But I just can’t feel that way about him. I’m always looking for reasons not to see him, as when I do I’m just constantly thinking up conversations. I’m really outgoing and confident where he is very reserved! He’s only met my friends once in this time period as I was just so embarrassed as my friends are all like me and it was horrible hearing them try and talk loads to him and getting one words answers from him. I could tell exactly what they were thinking. I really want to end things with him and if the opportunity arose to be friends as I feel a constant weight on my shoulders but I also don’t want to hurt him! Shall I carry on unhappy knowing I’ve got someone’s who’s really nice cares for me and wouldn’t hurt me, or do I do what makes me happy

Well you've got to do what makes you happy OP, why would you choose unhappiness?

At what point in your two-year r’ship did you start feeling bored?

Gosh, been there. Albeit only for 3 dates because I could see it was going to become a problem.

I think it's one of those situations op where there just genuinely is a fundamental mismatch.

Convo should flow or at least, you should both be comfortable in each others company elwhen there is silence.

No one wants to stay in the room with father stone in 'Father ted' for long tbf. But in a romantic relationship it's a total non starter.

You've bern trying fir 2 years. Give yourself permission to say 'you know what, he is not the one for me and it's ok to walk away'.

Maybe he'll find someone more compatable fir him too and he deserves that. Someone who will love him to bits, sat in silence together lol.

I think a big part of maturing is learning that it's not selfish to end things that dont work for you. Give other people autonomy over how they move on from these relationships. Because whilst break ups are sad, they are part of life and we cannot protect people from them at the expense of our own happiness.

DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY! I can’t stress this enough to you op! I was in the same boat as you and let it drag on for SIX years!! In the end I resented him SO much!

My ex was like his and add a gaming obsession on top of it. He'd spend all day every weekend doing virtual car racing, even to the detriment of us having a social life or going out etc. He would say he'd do better and never changed as ultimately that is just his personality. I decided i couldnt live with that and left.

youre basically with someone for 2 years because you feel bad about upsetting someone by dumping them?
Im not judging as I think a lot of us have stayed in relationships way past their sell by date out of guilt and loyalty, but it is a waste of everyones time. He isnt a charity case. He deserves someone who is properly interested in what he has got to offer, and so do you deserve someone that youre interested in

Sounds like you need to move on if it has been like this for any length of time have things changed? The first few years are supposed to be amazing!
Sounds like you are not well matched you would probably be doing you both a favour to end it, as would you want to be with someone who is looking to end things with you but has not and looks for reasons not to see you ?

I have no idea how you ended up in a long-term relationship with this person. Of course you should break up with him! If he's as nice and decent as you say then he deserves to be with someone who is actually into him.

Can you explain why you're still with him?