So I started up a relationship with my best friend. I've had a v v hard time of thongs recently and he's really been there for me; it's spilled into something more.
We had an amazing month, great time together, loving messages.
I had a difficult bereavement and the fall out from everything else that's happened this year.8 felt really vulnerable and insecure. So I asked to go back to being friends for a bit. He also worried we'd started something up too soon.
I quickly realised that it wasn't possible to be friends any more either and it was hurting me. We had a long conversation where it turns out his feelings have changed, he doesn't know if he ever wants to be with me, he feels foolish for getting involved at the wrong time.
So I marked my boundaries and have cut all contact.
But I'm struggling. I miss him so much. I desperately want to be with him. But apparently rly he told a mutual friend he's thinking about dating again. I'm absolutely heartbroken. How do I get through this? I won't contact him but I so want to. I wish he missed me as much as I miss him. I just don't understand how his feelings can change so suddenly. It just not have ever been real.