How long were you with your do before TTC

[PenguinsAreCute]

I'm in a new relationship, have only been seeing each other for a few months and he is the nicest man that I've ever met.

We have had the baby talk as neither of us are getting any younger, I've always been a bit more if it happens it happens if it doesn't it doesn't, life would be fine either way. However my new DP is really broody.

I'm 38 now so aware that time is not on my side, so for people who met their DP in their late 30's how long were you together before TTC?

I'm 39 (and a half) and have been with my DP for a year. (Although we knew each other as friends 2 years before that) We would both really love a child but are well aware our ages are against us. We've lived together 3 months. We have decided if things are still going well we'll start trying at the end of this year. But we have both prepared ourselves for the fact it might not work. I also wish we had met younger and had more time to do things. Especially as we've had covid rules pretty much throughout our relationship so haven't been able to do as many fun things as we could have. But at our age it really is pretty much now or never.

But presumably @IceCreamAndCandyfloss and @notacooldad you were not 38 when you met your partners?

The OP doesn't have 6 years to get to know him

I married at 29 after knowing H for 3 years. I was ready to marry earlier but he wasn't.

Conceived after 18 months of marriage and first child born when I was 31.

I had in my head that I wanted DCs before 35.

I had other friends who married at 35 and 36 and went on to have 2 DCs each before they reached 40.

But presumably @IceCreamAndCandyfloss and @notacooldad you were not 38 when you met your partners?

The OP doesn't have 6 years to get to know him hmm
That is true but I would also be very cautious if I was the OP about diving into a pregnancy with a bloke that she has only just met. How many threads are there about someone meeting the nicest guy ever, the guy is really keen to have children so she gets pregnant by them and they ended up being a controlling freak monster? I know and understand that the op feels like she's running out of time but I would advice to take a deep breath and not get swept up in the baby talk just yet.
I know 💯 % that I could be wrong and I hope things work out.

10 months.

Best choice I ever made. I just knew he was the one. He’s only ever proved that to me over and over again.

@notacooldad Yes, but, people rarely come to forums saying how well life has worked out for them. Forums where people ask for advice are often skewed with tales of woe.

Whirlwind relationships can work, and equally, long 'courtships' can end in disaster too.

I think the important thing for the OP to consider is if she'd be happy being a single Mum if she does go ahead and conceive soon, but the relationship breaks down.

I'm slightly concerned the man in this set up is broody because he doesn't have a bio clock (in the same way) so I'd not want him to be putting pressure on the OP for his own needs to be a dad.

3 years but I was 27 when we met

Knew him for 11 years, married 6 months. Had two children, he had an affair and we are divorcing. So yes, in an ideal world you would get to know someone for a few years but even that doesn't guarantee you a great partner or father for your children (although thankfully he is a good dad..I just didn't get the partner bit in the end)

Egg freezing has incredibly low success rates, think 2% of eggs thawed result in a pregnancy, 0.7% in a live birth. It’s not something to pin your hopes on.

If you’re both really keen for kids might be best just to go for it. I was mid 20s when I met dh, we’d been together 7 years, married for 4 of those when we started to. Part of the reason we waited though was that we were young, just getting going in careers, dh started his own business and we wanted to be more settled first. If we’d met later I think we would have got married and started ttc much sooner. I knew he was ‘the one’ on our third date. I think when you know, you know. Still together after 20 years.

Some info on egg freezing, my sister is a mw and she started a family late 30s and I remember talking about egg freezing and that actually it’s not really an option.

Egg-freezing: What's the success rate? www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51463488

[quote AbstractEim]Some info on egg freezing, my sister is a mw and she started a family late 30s and I remember talking about egg freezing and that actually it’s not really an option.

Egg-freezing: What's the success rate? www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51463488[/quote]
I'd second getting your fertility checked out at a fertility clinic. They can advise on your personal circumstances whether egg freezing would be a suitable option for you.
I have also heard that egg freezing in comparison to embryo freezing has much lower success rates, as mentioned by the poster above, poor thawing /live birth rates. Slightly off topic, I'd started assisted reproduction on my own as a single woman aged 38, I certainly wasn't encouraged to freeze my eggs (despite the fact I had a very good ovarian reserve and AMH level), if anything I was advised to get a move on (which I did) but it is important to be informed with the correct information.

OP I was the same age when I met my DP, we decided to try within a year (we were living together) and I got pregnant within a couple of months. I had the easiest pregnancy ever, healthy baby etc.

I live a fairly healthy active lifestyle but had previously had cancer on my womb. I have had cancer twice since and have had a hysterectomy.

I'm trying to give a rounded picture and to echo what a previous poster said, there's no rhyme or reason.

In your shoes I knew I would be fine as a single mother if things didn't work out. So far they are. But you're right, you can't fully know him yet. Could you manage on your own? I really really wanted to be a mother. In hindsight I should have exercised more caution but really I didn't expect to get pregnant given my medical history. And if I had waited, it would have been too late as I got an advanced cancer diagnosis within two years and started aggressive chemo.

So in answer... I have no answers. Sorry. Good luck though :)

We were together 6 months when we decided to try for a baby, I was pregnant 2 months later. was 36, him 38. It just felt right - and still does 15 years later.

Fell pregnant first try at 2 years, 10 months

19 day old DD is currently asleep in my arms 😍

DH is 16 years older than me, I'm 31 now and already have a nearly 7 year old DS so we had to get cracking 👏🏼

Mine's not normal, but we conceived 8 weeks into the relationship and were both happy about it. I already had kids and it was his first. It was meant to be and a couple of years later we married. I was just really sure if him early on and thought if things don't work out on the off chance, I'd carry on being a single mum with an additional baby.

You sound a bit ambivalent about having DC's, and given that men have all the time in the world for it, I'd wonder why he's pushing for this more than you are. It could be his way of pinning you down. I'd suss out what kind of dad he plans to be, as if he expects you to bring up the DC while he gets the fun side, I can't see you being the type to enjoy that radical lifestyle change.
Better to think, would I want to marry this person first? Then the next step DC as it gives financial protection.

About 15 months, after living together for 8ish months. I was 35 when we met and 37 when we started ttc. You will know when the the time is right.

In hindsight I would pay to have a fertility check up including AMH levels to check ovarian reserves and whether you ovulate (day 3 and day 21 bloods).