How soon to walk away from a relationship where we want different things?

[TableTops85537]

A couple of months ago I met a great man and really like him. We’re official, but haven’t exchanged ‘I love you’ or anything so it’s still very early days.

I found out last night he wants kids. I don’t. Should I walk away now? I’ve been single for years and didn’t think I’d find someone I really want to be with, but I don’t want to get more attached then have to split up anyway.

If you're sure you don't and he's sure he does then I'd say yes, best to walk away now. It's the one thing you can't compromise on

I agree with @Fairycake2. There's no middle ground here. All you can do is walk away before you get in too deep.

I was in a similar position. Single for years. Met a lovely man. Turns out he's 11 years younger than me and really wants kids. He didn't realise how much older I was. And that even if we were the same age, I don't want kids. So that was it. We tried to just be friends. It broke my heart. I don't see him at all now as it still hurts.

I know a couple who went through this and unfortunately it didn’t end well. She didn’t want to get married or have children and he did. They were together for years maybe like 8, they had a house together but she knew it wasn’t going to last, she just didn’t want kids. They split and he’s now married with two children. They were both devastated I think he secretly hoped she’d change her mind. If you’re 100% positive you don’t want kids and he definitely does then you’re both setting yourself up for heartbreak in the future by ignoring this. 😔

Did he say whether he “wants kids” as in actively desires to be a father and can’t imagine life without becoming one; or as in always assumed he’d end up as one because that’s generally what adults do when they reach a certain stage in their life, but hasn’t given it much more thought?

If the former it’s best for both of you to break things off now. You’ll end up hurting badly down the line, when you can avoid most of the hurt now.