Mismatched Drive

[Horsesforcourses23]

Urgh, sorry it sounds so stupid posting about this but honestly I am at my witts end having the same conversation over and over again.

My partner and I seem to have a mis-matched sex drive. I am happy for once or twice a week, he want's it all the time. He get's super sulky when we don't do it or a I reject him. He say's that for him to feel loved etc he get's it through physical affection, which I understand.

Equally he does not take on board the emotional load I have to deal with - I do ALL the house management, cooking, cleaning etc etc. Work and have elderly parents to care for.

We have talked about this again and again and do not seem to get any further, aside from that we have a good relationship.

But I really do not know what to do anymore - or what to say. I don't really want to do it more than we already do and he wants to do it way more and we can't seem to find a compromise.

Any suggestions or advise?

No magical solution to that, unfortunately.
Break up or compromise - he mostly helps himself on the days you aren’t up for it. And maybe on some of those days you give him a ‘helping hand’, often they don’t even need much.

But for that it seems that as a couple you need to solve other issues in your relationship that clearly are causing resentment on your side - even though you seem to not acknowledge it.

Why are YOU the one doing all the cleaning, cooking, etc????? How can you possibly have a ‘good relationship’ with that setup?

Leave him
He's a sex pest and a bully

You shouldn't have to have more sex than you want just to stop him sulking. Whatever the reason, he needs to listen to you and he's not. That's the key thing. Then sulking, eugh, , how
unattractive. Why can't he have a wank instead?

Have you suggested he take some of the load off you and do more of his share?

The thing is, you still don't want sex more often do you? How long have you been married, do you have DC?

We do have 2 small ish children (1 child each from previous) and we have been together about 4 years. I think it just ended up with me doing everything and I have had that conversation that maybe if I wasn't responsible for everything all the time then maybe I would feel a bit more up for it, but it seems to fall on deaf ears.

It's just the same conversation time and again and I feel like I am hitting my head against a brick wall.

You will continue to have the same convo over and over unless he also agrees to compromise and make changes. Theres only so long you can have the same conversation. The sulking though, that would be it for me. No housework help AND sulking, does he realise you don't want to shag a teenager?

No housework help AND sulking, does he realise you don't want to shag a teenager?

I don't know how to do a laughing face - but that exactly!! I have said that aswell that it is like living with a horny teenager!

Stop talking about it, he clearly isn’t interested in a solution where he has to change. You need to ask yourself, if his immaturity is worth your time.