Ex moving on...

[glassofsquash]

I am not entirely sure what I seek to gain with this other than a rant!

After 4 long years of living with significant DA and depression I moved out of the family home with our children. On leaving, I made it clear that I still loved him and hoped he used this time to sort himself out. Counselling was lined up.

It's been months now, he's thrown his teddies out of the pram more times than I can count.

I've found out he's been spending time with his ex (who proceeded me. I suspect they are also sleeping together. Realistically this is none of my business but why does it hurt so much? This woman has text me trying to arrange child contact and in all honesty this has hit me like a train.

For a few reasons, he's always claimed his aim was reconciliation and secondly he's never said a nice word about this ex.

How does one move on from this?

You move on one step at a time. Giving yourself permission to have occasional wobble on the way
You invested emotionally and mentally and of course it feels complicated and you wonder all the what ifs
You need to maintain cordial contact as coparents and model good behaviour, that’ll require effort and self discipline to maintain
Don’t sweat all the minutiae of his personal like,don’t be drawn into unpleasant drama

Why’s his ex / current GF contacting you to arrange contact?

Has he asked for it previously and you’ve refused? If so, why? Or had he not bothered until now?

This woman has text me trying to arrange child contact and in all honesty this has hit me like a train.

Huh? Why is she contacting you? I would send a polite message saying you will only be making arrangements with your ex and then block her.

To answer some questions, no I have not withheld child contact. There was no reason for her to message me other than I suspect to cause me pain.