Hello,
Long story short, my husband is constantly grumpy over the issues in the house.
We have a young child, so obviously, there's some related mess and in general, the house gets messy pretty fast. The car also. We bought a cleaning robot which we put every day, so I think it's not so bad.
Then, we have flies in the backyard. I don't know how their quantity compares to the "normal" levels, but for the last 3 years, he's constantly putting attractants, killing them, disposing of thousands of flies, then starts over. It's very tedious to even watch. I'm thinking that he's attracting all the neighbooring flies, but he's insisting that it's all flies that bread in our trees....
I dislilke flies like anyone else, but it's not like they are sitting on us, so I don't feel affected by them flying in the plants. But it causes anxiety for him apparently.
This year, I convinced him to get 3 chickens in an attempt towards some self-sufficiency. He's now convinced that the chickens make it worse. Of course, he's putting fly attractants with sticky papers next to them and then watches thousands of flies and it puts him in a bad mood (and since chickens were my idea, I guess for him, I'm somehow responsible for the flies).
Then, I had a couple of budgies who unexpectedly reproduced, so he's fed up of the budgies flying around. I already told him that I'm going to sell the babies, I'm just waiting for their gender to be clear. I take care of them myself, clean as much as I can, but I guess that also puts him in a bad mood.
I told him that maybe he needs a vacation alone to which he answered that he needs a permanent vacation from us as the mess is everywhere. I think that some quantity of mess is always to be expected unless you want to spend your days cleaning and organizing. For a several years, we had renovations and that was bad and when I was saying how bad it felt, he was always telling me to be positive, so I don't know where his "positivity" went.
Should I get rid of all my budgies and the chickens just to make him less grumpy? I am not the most organized person in the world, but I don't think I am so bad. I planted a lot of flowers which make our garden look good, but he always have something to repair and put his tools on top of plants, etc. actually making it look less nice, so I don't understand the attitude that "he needs a permanent vacation from us"....