‘D’ H being so inconsiderate

[RainyDay2020]

I am fuming with my H right now and need to vent.

I had major surgery a couple of weeks ago which I’m still recovering from. I can’t lay flat in bed so have been sleeping propped up on the sofa as it’s the only way I get a little bit of sleep at night.

This evening H announced he wanted a gaming session with his brother, I said fair enough but asked 3 basic things:

• Not too late as I’m exhausted and achy and need to go to sleep at a reasonable time

• not be too loud and maybe turn off the controller noise and vibration so as not to wake the kids

• don’t be aggressive and sweary as he knows it makes me anxious

It’s now 11pm and he’s “only just getting going” lots of noise and swearing and huffing and puffing and bouncing up and down on the sofa.

I just asked him to call it a day or at least quiet down so I can attempt sleep and he was shitty with me. I’m so pissed off and upset.

Big backstory as I am supposed to be resting for at least 6 weeks post surgery and his promises (In front of family and announced on fuckin Facebook) to “look after me” lasted less than a week.

@RainyDay2020

SpindleWhorl Yes I was upstairs for a while sitting in a chair up there but came down about 10:30 and asked him to turn it off so I could go to sleep (on sofa). He got stroppy and continued to play for almost another hour while I’ve been sat the other end of the sofa within for him to Turn game off and F off so I can sleep.

I think some pp thought you were lying on your bed upstairs, all cozy, while he had his brother round.

I suspected with my sleuthing that you were sitting right next to the loud, jumpy tool.

Sorry if I’ve not explained well.

I need to sleep in lounge on sofa post surgery.

H decided to have an extended online gaming session in the lounge with his brother and mates which meant I could t go to sleep - no one actually in the house. (Kids asleep but I was worried they be woken by swearing and noise).

I went upstairs for a bit to get away from DH but came back down and asked for the 3rd time for it to stop so I could to you sleep.

Urghhh is it world of warcraft or similar? Men who are overly into those games are so frustrating. Used to date one and whatever their online team needed was always no 1 importance 🙄

TheDaydreamBelievers
Not world of Warcraft but an army style game - I think it’s Call of Duty.

He seems very selfish
I hope you got some sleep but use this time to assess whether this is what you want from your husband

@Shoxfordian thank you
Today will be difficult on only a couple of hours sleep. I will try and talk to him about it all today, a lot rests on his reaction to be honest.

Good luck @RainyDay2020. I hope you get the reaction you’re looking for. I also hope that if you do, it is backed up with consistent behavioural change. Words aren’t enough.

I hope he reacts well too although I’m not expecting it given your posts. Marriage is supposed to be in sickness and in health and he seems to be failing on the sickness part

Him and his games console would be going out the door 😅😅 what an inconsiderate prat.

What a selfish shit he is.

I had a big surgery when DS was 4 months old. The day I came home from the hospital, my (now Ex) “d”P hadn’t done ANYTHING. I had to cook dinner, make DSs bottles, get up with DS in the night, do the laundry etc. I never looked at him the same again and within the year I dumped him. It’s inexcusable. I hope you feel better ASAP @RainyDay2020 💐💐

My eldest decided to sell his games console aged 16 because he wanted to spend time with his girlfriend and friends and needed to study for his GCSEs. He knew that having it around was too much temptation and even now 3 years later, he just sometimes borrows his little brothers console.

My bf can get into his game and I told him it was affecting our relationship. He wasn't as present even when not playing. So he changed the games he was doing.

Games and hobbies are great but when it starts impacting your loved ones, you know it's time to change something.

@Sakurami
My eldest decided to sell his games console aged 16 because he wanted to spend time with his girlfriend and friends and needed to study for his GCSEs. He knew that having it around was too much temptation

Did he just decide himself to do that? Or how on earth did you get him to make that decision? Thats bloody brilliant. Asking for friend.

Yep, he just decided himself. Wish I was that self disciplined !