Stay with a good man and a man I won’t ever have sex with again?

[Copper2020]

Which?

On the brink of divorce but keep wavering as he is a nice person.

Don’t fancy him.

I’m 42, should I accept there’s more to life then Sex and think of the children.

Splint would,be amicable but sad.

I would like to be wanted 🥲

Same here too. It’s such a hard choice

There’s a huge difference between a sexless marriage and a marriage that lacks intimacy.
Do you still have any physical contact, hand holding, cuddling up in bed, kisses?

Have your feelings for one another changed, do you still communicate well, are you able to tune in to each other’s feelings?

How does your husband feel about current situation?

@InkieNecro, I'm not sure how long you have been with your partner but dating with children can bring lots of issues that appear over time. Head over to Stepparents board.

Op, are you prepared to be single and have no sex life as that could be the outcome. Decent men are hard to find, not impossible but very tricky. As you get older you have less choice as men in their 40s tend to choose partners 10 years younger.

If you're prepared to be single then you won't feel ending your marriage was futile.

Depends on whether the lack of desire is both ways. And whether the lack of desire indicates deeper disconnect..

I was personally delighted to offload a crap ex Husband 8 years ago. Deslighted. But it’s still been very very hard, dating afterwards has been a hugely complex minefield, with kids always coming into the mix and needing juggled.

For anyone wanting to move on to a better relationship, I would say….. when you exit a marriage that’s your one shot at a reasonably straightforward set up. Gone. For ever. Anything that comes after is mired in complexity (ex partners, other people’s kids, other people’s exes).

If you want a glimpse of the horror of dating after divorce then head over to the Step Patenting board.

I just can't ever leaving a good man just because of sex. I feel like it's so overrated. If we click on every level but sex i don't think it's worth ending a relationship or marriage over.

I could have written your post myself. I feel the same OP and it's a really tough decision. I have days where I am determined and feel strong enough to go it alone, and then other days where I worry that I will be consumed with regret and 'what ifs'.

Hell no -
42 is way too young to give up on passion

How do you feel otherwise in the relationship?
Loved? Cared for?
Is he a good man? Would he be there for you?
If it's just a sex issue, I think I'd stay. But if its other issues too, I'd be gone. (and I did go, no current partner or fwb and I don't feel as lonely as I did when with the ex)

Not many good men out there to be fair..its a cesspit out there.. id stick

A lot of my friends are in sub optimal marriages, for want of a better phrase, I think its fairly common to stay for ease, only you can decide if you can live with that.
As I get older I am starting to think this relationship thing is over rated though, I seem to always end up doing more fun stuff with my friends, the men just stay home!

My DH is a nice, kind man.
But, due to his job I was left on my own a LOT when I had the children. I was very lonely.
He has told little lies.
He has got us into money trouble that I wouldn’t have allowed if I’d known, but he also got us out of it by working (and being away) more.
He has always drunk, he drinks a bottle of wine every day, but drank more when working. I’ve gone to bed desperate for him to join me, but he preferred to sit downstairs and drink wine.
He got ED due to antidepressants and was advised to get viagra, he didn’t. Our sex life suffered, so we don’t anymore.
There’s no hand holding, no kiss, no cuddle. I’d love to be loved again.
I’ve got such deep resentment. I’ve fantasised about leaving but I don’t as I’d lose my house. I’d HAVE to work, he is retired so his money is guaranteed.
So I stay for the house, his guaranteed income, and because it’s easier to stay than split up.

[quote Fireflygal]@InkieNecro, I'm not sure how long you have been with your partner but dating with children can bring lots of issues that appear over time. Head over to Stepparents board.

Op, are you prepared to be single and have no sex life as that could be the outcome. Decent men are hard to find, not impossible but very tricky. As you get older you have less choice as men in their 40s tend to choose partners 10 years younger.

If you're prepared to be single then you won't feel ending your marriage was futile.[/quote]
I am confident that we will be able to work around any difficulties as we already have done regarding parenting styles and situations, but thank you. I am convinced of this because we both have aspergers and are both very forthright and naturally don't hide anything because of this.