I had two children with my partner. They are 3 and 6. I had my mortgage from 19. I'm now 32. He went on it when I was 23.
I stopped working after my second child. A: because I need to do all the childcare and school runs. It worked moneywise.
B: I'm under gynecology and trying to get to the bottom of my periods being extremely bad and heavy. I couldn't work because I literally can't leave the house 5 days a month. I go through several pairs of trousers and pass extremely large clots and everything I stand up blood pours down my legs. It's a miserable situation and makes me feel unwell for a few days afterwards. I never had this problem until having children and it has ruined carpets, mattresses and holidays.
Anyway. Back to my relationship. It broke down. After my second child my partner couldn't finish. So sex became a long chore and we had to just stop after about an hour of him really struggling.
He then became depressed and obsessed with conspiracy theories. He was embarrassing me infront of family in the end. Nothing could be said or enjoyed anymore. He got so focused on celebrities and accusations. The 1%. THE PLAN. THE CONTROL. I was just getting down myself. I told him in July last year I had had enough. I felt it was over. Then I met someone else in November. We were only talking and getting to know each other. Nothing physical. So I told my children's dad again that we were not working. I wanted to be friends for the kids. Told him about the guy I liked. He decided to wait and see if I changed my mind. Things didn't work out with the bloke and in March this year we stopped. He was an idiot anyway. My ex has just waited and carried on as normal. He still hasn't registered it despite us sleeping separately. No sexual stuff has happened in 2.5 years. Absolutely nothing.
Lately he's been obsessed with the vaccines. The control. Masks. Passports. The plan. He told me this morning whilst I was trying to sort the kids he was anxious and I was cold and didn't show affection. I wanted to yell at him that he needs to face up to what I've been saying for the last year and realise we don't have a relationship anymore. I told him I presumed he was anxious about the usual. He confirmed he was. I told him that he needed to speak with a Dr or a friend about it as I do not look at it how he does and I've tried many times in the past to stop him looking at things online. His dad has noticed too. He made me feel really heartless and guilty.
I honestly don't know what to do. We both own the house. I can't work until I've got this problem sorted with my body. I feel trapped. I want to move on and find someone on my wave length. I'm not actively looking but hope it comes naturally one day. My ex pays for everything's certificate 2017 and ofcourse I'm grateful and he's a great dad etc. But I feel like I can't move out. I'm not entitled to anything and don't currently earn.
We get on OK for our kids. But he's never going to let me go with words and say I accept we are fully done. He still seems to think I belong to him. He's not told anyone in his family. He's forcing me to live a lie.
What would the right thing be in this situation .I'm not trying to be heartless but he's made me miserable with his ways. I feel like we just grew apart as we've aged. I feel like he's so negative and heavy. I just want to feel balanced again and able to enjoy an adult life.
Has anyone got any advice.
We've no