Help me with difficult 7 year old

[Changedna124]

I stupidly posted under AIBU. Basically I want to improve my relationship with my daughter abs not get upset when she says she hates me. I do everything for her but she still hates me. Yesterday for example there was no school abs we had a pamper day but she had a tantrum because I wouldn’t let her paint her brothers face! Not nails but she wanted to draw a tattoo on his face with pink nail varnish.

I suppose I should have posted this rather than how her behaviour makes me upset. She constantly tell me she hates me

Been there, had that. She’s trying to get a rise from you. You have to take a deep breath and tell her that you love her but that her behaviour (tell her exactly what she’s done/wants to do that is wrong) is not ok. Eg you can’t paint nail varnish on your brothers face because we can’t use the remover on someone’s face, it would hurt etc.
Mine told me he hated me and wanted to live at his friends house. Turns out his friend was saying the reverse to his mum. From memory I think he was about 8 when this happened.
You have to see it for what it is - an attempt to get her own way by needling you - not the end of a relationship. She’s not trying to break up with you, but get her own way.

How about trying, every time she says 'I hate you' saying 'That's a shame because I really love you'.

Don't rise to it. Don't show anger or upset. Go on with your day. If you struggling to cover your upset, leave the room.

By the way I do think that it's OK for children to see when they have upset someone - they need to learn that their actions have repuercussions. But in this case, it seems as though she is trying to get this response, so it's best not to show it, and she may just grow out of it.

Hi op by this age I think rather than getting upset you have a conversation about emotions and how words can hurt. She’s at an age where you can being these conversations.
How does she react if you get upset? X

*begin

Does she have a sen? My dd is 6 nearly 7 and she never says this. She wouldn't want to paint her face neither or her sisters face. She did my make up last week quite well acc my mascara never looked as good before if I say no she does say things like I don't love her etc and then I love her.

Get her assessed for adhd or autism. Ban ipad and let her stay in her room without bothering her until she calms down. Don't forget 2 leave a drink in there. I do this with my 11 year old