My single life - month 1

[FairyAtTheBottomOfTheGarden]

I ended a 5 year relationship last month, which followed a 25 year relationship. I had hoped the more recent relationship would develop into something meaningful, but it had just fizzled out to friendship.

I was tempted with dating sites but instead reached out to old friends, made new friends and made sure I enjoyed the time I spent on my own. I had a couple of guys show interest but I'm really not keen.

So, after one month, I'm loving single life and am definitely not interested in looking for love right now. Someone amazing is going to have to do something very special to change that!

Let's see how I feel after month 2...

I have split with partner of 20 years . Friends encouraging me to try OLD but I am enjoying being on my own. It’s a bit lonely sometimes but I love being able to please myself what I do and when .

@FairyAtTheBottomOfTheGarden

Glad to hear you are feeling positive after your break up OP!

I’m 5 weeks out of a 2.5 year relationship and feel very much like you, I feel like my life is stress free and I like not having to worry about anyone else!

Roll on month 2!

Hi I was in an abusive marriage for 30yrs, been separated for 2. Been talking to my husband about reconciling but my daughter who is 36 and not his days she won’t talk to me if I go back, I feel he has changed as he has had a breakdown and seems a lot calmer. Any views on this please.

In my experience the longer we are single the more and more we enjoy it!

@jojo220263
Your daughter is right

I’ve been single for 5 years, you really do get use to it can’t see myself dating anyone ever again

There's a real movement to place singledom in its rightful place of being a completely equal state to coupledom. Some really interesting podcasts, Ted talks, and books...especially The Unexpected Joys of being Single by Catherine Grey, & Alonement by Francesca Specter. Reframing being single as the normal state a large proportion of the population enjoy. Would recommend.

Do you not think that maybe he has changed, or is it because of being with him for 30yrs that it’s just hard for me to let go.
Should you always listen to your daughter even though she is a grown woman with her own family. It’s so confusing for me at the moment.

Thanks Feminem I'll look out for those

jojo220263 did you mean to post on this thread? You might get more replies if you start a new one... I think you should take your daughter's advice too though.

@jojo220263
2 things! Start a thread. You will get so much help and empathy
As a daughter of someone, I wouldn’t in anyway say I would end a relationship with my own mother unless the abuse was so bad that I felt I had no choice. So that speaks volumes, if he has changed into a wonderful person then that’s good for him. But if he’s abused you for 30 years then it’s highly unlikely. He’s hoovering you. Google it.
3rd - START a thread NOW

20 year relationship with a narcissist, a year on my own and then a 5 year relationship which almost saw me going down the aisle. I thankfully come to my senses and realised he was drug addict who would always lie to me and drag me down if I continued the relationship.
I've been on my own now for nearly a year and I've never been happier!
Just me and my kids, my home had never looked nicer, I've never looked and felt better in my life and I'm convinced that it's because all of the energy I would spend on my ex partners and said relationships - I AM NOW INVESTING IN MYSELF 😊
I've started back at the Gym, consistently this time as no one else to worry about, I've taken time decorating my home to my taste, nobody else has a say so. Rediscovered my love of reading and I've developed a love of gardening.
I've spent so much of my life tip toeing around men and there wants, needs, moods and problems that there wasn't a moment/thought left for myself.
My life is my own now and don't get me wrong, I enjoy a bit of a flirt or find it flattering if I get a second look but anymore than that and I'm running for the hills.

Sorry but I’d hardly call being single a month being single…

@Wherearemymarbles

Sorry but I’d hardly call being single a month being single…

Which is why I'm doing a 'month 1' post, ti see whether I'm loving it as much as the months go on...