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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Help me live with this

4 replies

Learntolivehere · 12/07/2021 15:09

I’m full of regret. I moved abroad from the uk 20 years ago to a country where the British are not well liked. My parents were originally from here but my accent is clearly English so I stick out a bit. I didn’t realise how unliked we are here and how across the board it is. I learned fairly early on but thought it would get better as I became more accepted and I’d get used to it. It hasn’t got better. And I’m stuck here as I now have had my family here. The dislike is constant and I’m so unhappy.
I guess I’d like to know two things. One, if anyone else knows this feeling and can relate and how/if you cope and two, as I can’t leave, how I go about reconciling myself to this. My husband and kids would not want to leave. They’re from here and I’m now the odd one out. I think I need some kind of counselling to get a thicker skin or something. Can you learn to block stuff like this out, do you think? Please be gentle, as I already feel very alone.

OP posts:
PieceOfString · 12/07/2021 15:14

That's a long time to not be accepted. Prejudice against a person for an identity which is not of their choosing is ignorant of and cruel wherever it is found. In all that time had no-one for to know you and realise you are good to know? How awful and isolating.
I'm sorry I have no advice since your family have roots and don't want to move, they don't sound very sympathetic or understanding though. 🙁

PieceOfString · 12/07/2021 19:10

Giving this a bump for you, I have sympathy but not much helpful advice as I've not been in this position. Maybe someone wiser than me will come along. X

moresugarpls · 12/07/2021 20:07

Following this as I’m in a similar position Sad

Suzi888 · 12/07/2021 20:13

Which country are you in? Have you tried to learn the language and integrate? If your parents were from this country you now live in, is it where you were born? Do you or your DH have other family there? Do you work there?

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