Hello Mumsnetters,
Browsing on here since I got pregnant. Hoping I can get some input from you lovely people...
I'm on the verge of splitting from DP. I want to tell you his pros and cons and tell me if you would have left him by now because sometimes I doubt myself. Bare in mind I'm far from perfect but I really do try with him.
Cons
•Has always had a wondering eye that kills me inside everytime
•Got with him when he was skint and he was the most happy go lucky fella, jovial, always up for a good time (on my dime) etc. When i got pregnant he stepped up; finally got a job and got us a flat but all a sudden he became miserable, moody, snappy and overly critical. Will tell me "why are you wearing that top its too small for you" when its not it's just that I'm 8 months pregnant and have a bump. Why do you do your hair like that etc.
•When I stopped paying for our food as my savings were almost gone and he was working & I'm not, after just 2 days of paying for our meals he said I was eating too much and should lose weight (I was around 7 months pregnant when he said this) and I swear to you he eats twice as much as me I was hardly having 3 proper meals a day
•I had to move out for a month (family reason) and when I came back house was filthy. He hadn't touched it and waiting for me to come back to clean up hoovering/bending etc. which I did at over 7 months pregnant
•8/10 what I do for him he doesn't appreciate because he feels I owe him for temporarily covering our expenses whilst I'm pregnant even though I did this for over 6 months of our relationship to the point I had to beg him to get a job
•He's never planned a day out for us ever. It's always been me. I used to be the one paying for it too and when I'd 'sometimes' ask him to cough up some money he'd always make a big deal out of it
•It's only been a year and he doesn't like talking to me in public anymore. As in when we eat out or I make him go for a walk with me there's no conversation. I even said to him the other day "talk to me" and he said "we'll talk later" but he'll get excited to speak to other women like a waitress in front of me etc.
•Never buys himself anything nice so I bout him a nice outfit (even though I can't even afford to) so we could have a nice evening out, he then acted embarrassed of me in public because im pregnant and put on weight. You could tell he didn't want to be seen with me
•I've cried, screamed, made myself ill talking to him about things he does, he cries and says sorry then does it again 2 days later
•Our baby is hopefully coming in a couple of weeks and he decides to voluntarily leave his job out the blue
•Plans to move back to his mums now as he can no longer afford rent for us so either I move with him or move back to my mums
•Never had a job for longer than 3 months
•Bedroom activity is completely 1 way. I don't enjoy it at all to the point it's so uncomfortable borderline painful and actually close my eyes until its over. I only do it for him and he expects it everyday. If I refuse and say I don't feel well one day (when I genuinely dont) he will have a tantrum and make a fuss. I hate his kisses always have but overlooked it because we used to have such a good time hanging out
•Very judgmental on anything I say or do. Will literally blatantly stare at my face looking for flaws on my skin
•Acts very immature in public. Talks to strangers in a jokey way that isn't funny to the point they look down at him at times
•Lazy e.g. Has left me to walk home alone from station at midnight on dangerous road with heavy bags heavily pregnant instead of meeting me even though I told him when i was a few stops away that I had heavy bags
Good points:
•Gave me good massages whilst pregnant
•Gives me money when I ask/sometimes beg for it as I'm not working at the moment (but will never volunteer or get the groceries himself)
•Enjoy watching TV shows with him
•Can be affectionate and playful at times
I'm having his baby now. Do I just stick it out with him and see if he changes? Or should I prepare for single motherhood? I'm really conflicted.