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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Do you think he still has feelings?

13 replies

pinkisthenewred · 09/07/2021 21:45

I split with my boyfriend in March.
We had a big miscommunication and a big argument.
He ended up blocking me and i assumed we were done.

Two weeks later I messaged him on messenger saying I would post him his concert ticket in the mail
He said thanks and we chatted for a day on messenger.
Now 6 weeks later I noticed he unblocked me but didn't message.
Then he messaged on messenger saying he had unblocked me,and he had unblocked a few people not just me???

Anyway since then he has been messaging every day and talking.
Sometimes first thing on a morning and having convos throughout the day.
He re added me back to social media.

I know this is going to sound very juvenile...but do you think he realises he made a mistake ?
Any feelings ?

OP posts:

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 09/07/2021 21:54

No. If most people realised they had made a mistake they would be 1. Acknowledging that mistake 2. Apologising 3. Asking for some sort of forgiveness. Not telling you they've unlocked you and that also they've done it to loads of people so you dont go thinking you're special

TheFoundations · 09/07/2021 22:00

When somebody is interested in you enough that they're worth bothering with, you don't have to sift through their behaviour looking for covert signs.

Don't you want to be with someone who, if he feels he's made a mistake, has the balls to come to you and say 'I've made a mistake'?

On the same subject, re clear communication, what's stopping you from asking him rather than asking MN what he feels?

Original poster

pinkisthenewred · 09/07/2021 22:10

I think he only said "I unblocked everyone " so he doesn't look like he actually cares (if that makes sense )

I never get a straight answer from him so I don't want to come out and ask.

I just thought the fact he unblocked me /started messaging meant something

OP posts:

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 09/07/2021 22:17

Really don't waste your time with twats like this. He's doing it for an ego boost. Now's your chance to block him

StrongLegs · 09/07/2021 22:20

I think that clear communication is really the bedrock of a solid relationship, so if you are asking us instead of him, then unfortunately this relationship is probably not a good one for the long haul.

When you find the right guy, you will find that it is easy to talk to him. Which is important because in a few years, when you have kids or are old, you will have to sort out all sorts of weird and intimate problems together, and being able to be honest and feel safe doing that is terribly important.

Sorry, I sound about a thousand years old saying that, but I am knee-deep in midlife problems and eldely parents, and it's all very real-life here at the moment. The romance is right out of the window in favour of survival at this point, in favour of getting through the day.

OppsUpsSide · 09/07/2021 22:21

Why would he not say so if that was the case? Is he quite immature?

willowmelangell · 09/07/2021 22:24

Is his level of communication now, the same or different to pre bust up?

Original poster

pinkisthenewred · 09/07/2021 22:26

We are back to what it was before our argument.
Although now we aren't together
I'm confused it's heading back to that again or not.
I'm 31 so need exactly young but I'm confused

OP posts:

TheFoundations · 09/07/2021 22:27

@pinkisthenewred

I think he only said "I unblocked everyone " so he doesn't look like he actually cares (if that makes sense )

I never get a straight answer from him so I don't want to come out and ask.

I just thought the fact he unblocked me /started messaging meant something

Do you want a relationship with someone you never get a straight answer from?

Honeyroar · 09/07/2021 22:39

He sounds like a big kid. YOU would be making a mistake taking him back. Block him and continue getting on with your life.

OnceUponAMidnightBeery · 09/07/2021 22:50

Sorry to say this, but his only interest in you is as a possible back up shag. He just wants to keep you hanging on in case nothing better turns up/works out.

I’m sorry for being so harsh. But I think you need to lose your illusions here

Mrbob · 09/07/2021 22:53

He is keeping you on a hook. Remove yourself from that hook, ignore him and move on. If he is still interested it is only in either having a shag or blowing hot and cold repeatedly

Cam2020 · 09/07/2021 23:06

Then he messaged on messenger saying he had unblocked me,and he had unblocked a few people not just me???

So, exactly how many people did he have blocked? Having multiple people blocked in itself is not normal behaviour. That makes him sound either dramtic and childish or that he's gone and unblocked several previous girlfriends, waiting to see who'll bite. Neither is attractive.

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