Want to leave marriage but nowhere to go

[FluffieBabies]

I've been married for 6 years, together for 16 (met aged 35 and he made me wait 10 years for marriage & children) but after growing increasingly unhappy I want to leave and live on my own. The problem is there is nowhere I can move to. He paid for the house so it is only right that he has it. I don't have any proof of income to rent a flat, and I don't have any family I can stay with. We have 5 year old twins who I would like to have joint care of. I'm self employed but covid has decimated that for now, and hardy any jobs around due to covid. I've told him how I felt in the new year but 7 months have gone by and nothing has changed. I feel like I'm in limbo. I can't even start chatting to anyone else because I can't move out.

Forget the chatting to someone else. That will just make things even messier!

Sometimes you have to bide your time.

You need to get back to work first, build up some money and take it from there.

He paid for the house so it is only right that he has it.

Erm...no. That's not how it works. Either you have it and have primary care of the children, or he has it and has primary care, or you sell it and split the proceeds so you can both get a new place each.

See a solicitor immediately. You need guidance as to how to proceed.

Thanks very much for your replies guys.

The starting point for divorce is that the assets, including the house, shares, savings, pensions etc are split 50/50. If you have no way to rehouse yourself, then getting a solicitor's advice is a really good idea.

Start to get together a running away fund, get cashback every time you go shopping & open a bank account in your own name but don't let your husband know about it. Also get your name down with your local council & any housing associations that don't go through the council list. Do some detective work & get copies of your husband's payslips, any bank accounts he holds, pension statements etc, take photographs & store the pictures on a memory card, not your phone memory. Make sure you have hold of your & any dc birth certificates, passports, medical cards or red books etc, your driving licence, car insurance & log book. If you have a friend you can trust ask them to look after some clothing & any special personal belongings if you can remove them without your husband knowing, order a months supply of medication as well if you can & keep a copy of your prescriptions with you. Keep your car full of fuel & both sets of keys with you. Try & find a solicitor who offers a free 30 minute interview & get some legal advice so that as soon as you leave you can engage them if needed.