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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He said sorry but I think it was my fault?

3 replies

Helloasya · 28/06/2021 13:50

Head spinning!

Last night me and DP (don’t live together) were chatting on phone. He works weekends and was very tired. Had a nice chat then I brought up plans to see each other next. Wed already said Friday a few days ago and so I have no idea why I mentioned it. He then said he was happy to come to me instead but he would have to be back by Saturday to feed the cat. I said well we may as well stick with the original plan of me going to him and staying the weekend. He said yes he was just offering so I didn’t have to drive. I reacted badly and said why would you just want one night with me etc, to which he said sorry he was just tired and making a suggestion. We said goodbye and things were ok.

I didn’t sleep much but this morning he text me saying he was sorry he was so tired and of course he wants to spend time with me and misses me. He wished me a good day.

I feel like it’s me that should be apologising not him?! And I’ve since replied saying thanks for nice message and I feel the same about him

Do I send a follow up saying I’m sorry too for being over the top and dramatic? Or just leave it? I’m almost embarrassed to mention it as I feel so silly in retrospect but at the time I genuinely felt like he just wasn’t bothered about spending more than one night together. Part of me feels I should address the fact I was a bit of a twat but his message seemed clear he was sorry and that’s that? He also never messages in the morning so he was obviously thinking about it. I don’t want to open it up again. Maybe I should learn from this in private and not be a dick again? It just feels insincere as I do sense I was in the wrong.

I know this sounds like I’m 12. I’m actually over 30. Would you leave it?

OP posts:
BeneficiaryMadness · 28/06/2021 13:52

You sound hard work. Reacting badly over a suggestion? I would apologise to him.

Sparklfairy · 28/06/2021 13:54

Yeah just say I'm sorry too, I overreacted. And don't do it again!

Helloasya · 28/06/2021 13:54

@BeneficiaryMadness yes I feel like a twat. I almost don’t want to mention it now though as I know it came from a wave of insecurity thinking he didn’t want to spend more than a night with me! Who wants to raise that again?! I’ve learnt my lesson and feel shit about it

OP posts:
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