Please knock some sense into me before I text back?!

[Whoopstea]

I’m not great at relationships but for once I seem to be doing ok. It’s professed slowly but steadily. Together around 8 months. We’ve recently started telling each other in person that we miss and love each other. It’s never been said it text.

After a short text exchange about our day, tonight for the first time we said goodnight over text and then I just decided I’m going to text again to say: I miss you. He replied saying I miss you too.

I am now panicking that I need to send a link to a funny video or a photo from my day or say something mundane or admin-y like what time shall we meet on Sunday etc? Even though it’s totally not needed as we said goodnight before the I miss yous.

I’m embarrassed to say this but I’m worried if it’s left as it is he might freak out by morning thinking that things are really ramped up between us (we both wanted to take things slow) or my other concern is that he might wake up and look at his last message to me and feel like he doesn’t miss me? I know I sound crazy, please be gentle, I have very bad anxiety with relationships and I am working through this in therapy.

I would say you are overthinking this. Deep breaths. Trust that he likes you and trust that he will communicate with you with any issues/ worries etc. Ultimately you can't control what he's thinking anyway so any impulsive behaviour isn't going to change much really.

I know where you are coming from as I've felt similar in the past. Hugs 🤗

Thanks @frustratedwiththepandemic

I am overthinking massively, wondering if he’s just said it because I said it. Maybe he doesn’t really feel it. Maybe he feels pushed into saying it back?! Argh. I don’t know.

Did you not post the is exact same thing a few nights ago? Almost word for word?

@parkerpop no?! Please link me!

This is ringing a bell with me too.

The general consensus was that the op was overthinking and hitting the self destruct button. Deep breaths, he said it back. It’s sweet and nice, just leave it for tonight.

I know it’s easy for me to say that, I was exactly the same in relationships until I met my mr right who said all that sort of stuff unprompted and left me with no doubt as to how he felt! Thank god for Mr bubbles! I mean it gently but just step away now, read a book have some tea and relax xx

Thanks @Prettybubblesintheair

If he didn’t miss you too he’d have sent you an emoji or a “aw that’s nice to hear” or something!

I know it’s hard but leave it alone now. Any further messages are more likely to add to the conversation not detract from it! Any man who is scared off by the words I miss you is desperately emotionally stunted and best avoided so don’t worry about that.

I sent my DP a message the morning after our first night together saying similar. He just thought “yeah, she’s into me!”

Put the phone down.

“I miss you” really isn’t a big deal. I think my boyfriend may have texted me something like this after we had had just one date, hadn’t even slept together! (Which I know is in retrospect a bit idiotic - but it didn’t bother me in the slightest!) You have been seeing this guy 8 months. Missing him, and admitting to it, is normal!

Sorry about your anxiety - I know it makes everything harder…..