Sounds like you've lost your case even before you get a chance to make it with him. Whatever it is.
I am not proud of this, but in relationships when I was young and inexperienced (and also, when I assumed that all men were bastards nad automatically owed me, just becvause they were men...) I used to autonatically take the defensive 'you are wring'position about every disagreement, then if he told me a home trusth or just made a valid point, I would twist it and then burst into tears.
Pathetic.
I grew out of it as boyfriends kept splitting up with me. So I recognise his behaviour, with considerble embarassement.
You DH is not a kid, he is a married man with a family. He is still acting like a stroppy barely-out-of adolescence me.
I did work this out for myself eventually, mainly because I wanted to change, have a lasting realtionship, and not be so cross all the time. Also because one (by then ex) boyfriend was quite clear with me how exhasted and battered he felt when we were together. And I liked and respected him enough to listen.
His reasons may be different - I don't know him. But I have a sense that I recognise my immature young self in him.
Whatever the reasons, not being able to talk about stuff is absolutely not a marriage, at the end of the day, is it? He needs to accept this, and know this isn't sustainable and you won't accept it long term. But you have to believe that yourself first I guess.