Text or face to face

[Beansontoast45]

So met this guy on a dating app. Spoke for a few days and then met up. All appears to be going ok.

My problem is that when we first started talking I mentioned my son just in general chit chat. The conversation then moved on to something else and I did not mention the fact that I also have a older son and daughter. The conversation didn’t go back into kids it wasn’t at all deliberate and I wasn’t sure if we would even meet up at all so just went with the flow of chat.

Planned on telling him if we met face to face but the right moment didn’t seem to happen. Now I’ve arranged to meet him again, how do I bring up the subject of having another two kids? Or should I text him? The kids are not actually kids, they’re adults (young adults) he obviously knows about the youngest.

I don’t know if I should, text him, tell him when we next meet or call him. What do you guys think. How should I word it? I don’t know if I’m overthinking it, I mean I don’t have two toddlers that he doesn’t know about and the ‘kids’ are both completely independent although they still live at home.

I’m surprised you both haven’t asked if the other has kids?

It's not a big deal as they are young adults. I would just bring them up casually on the next date.

You could just even say 'you know I dont think I even mentioned that I have two older kids' and then a bit about them.

If you live at home with three children, yes I would mention it before you next meet. Does he have children?

@LoopTheLoops

I’m surprised you both haven’t asked if the other has kids?

I know, I would have kind of expected him to say “is it just you and your son” or something. The conversation just moved on from when I mentioned my son and then I think he just assumed it was just me and my son.

Have you not asked if he has children? That would be a good opportunity to mention the others

I find it a bit odd he hasn't asked you much about yourself, who you live with etc when you've already met? Does the conversation revolve around him? I would tell him when you meet and he has the patience to listen about you.

@Backthewaywecame

If you live at home with three children, yes I would mention it before you next meet. Does he have children?

Yes but when I mentioned my son he said “oh my daughter does that too” and that’s when the conversation moved on. I probably should said at some point then about the other two but I was really busy, not paying much attention and thinking this is just another pointless talking stage.

Ask him "Do you have other children besides your daughter?" and go from there.

I’d mention it face to face when the opportunity presents itself.

@WatieKatie

I’d mention it face to face when the opportunity presents itself.

That’s what I’m thinking but I planned on doing that at our first meeting and it just never really came about. I mean, if it’s a problem to him then there is nothing I can do about it. I just don’t want him to think I’ve purposely lied because I’ve not. If I had known we would definitely meet I would have made a point of mentioning it before we met. I just went through all our messages and we’ve not spoke about kids, it’s more just ‘how was your day’ sort of stuff and the odd flirty joke. In a day to day basis I don’t do anything with my older two so I’ve not really had the opportunity to say “well I was at football with my older son or I took my daughter to school”

@SengaMac

Ask him "Do you have other children besides your daughter?" and go from there.

That sounds like a good way to approach it. Thank you.

It's not a big deal, even less so because they are young adults. 'Is it just you and your daughter then or do you have other dc' how old are they? Mine are x ages ...'

He might be in the same boat, probably 3 older kids at home 🤦🏼‍♀️

How would you like to be told? How would you feel? If he accepts them great, if not...his loss! X