Not happy anymore in my relationship

[BouncyDaisy]

I'm at a place where I'm not happy in my relationship any more. I'm with him for a few years. He's a good man but there's a few different issues. I'm jot going into here. I'm not happy with him or the relationship. We trundled along together for some time but it's not working for me anymore. The straw that's breaking the camels back for is is that he has a new job and he's working a completely different schedule and days to me. I know many couples would be able to make something like that work but for me i feel I need a shared day off together regularly to spend together. Even if that's one weekend a month. I do feel we need time off together and I can't see that happening from his new job. So all I see now are these small elements building up that's creating a gap and a drift between us.

All I need to do now is find the time and the words to do the dumping.

I have a slight issue in that, people I know - family, work, friends - they keep asking about him - like asking - how's x (the Mr name). I say something generic like he's kept busy with work. My true feelings is that I want to be done with that man but I don't want to blurt that out and I say he's fine. I hate it when people ask me about him especially now that my feelings about him and the relationship has changed. What do I say to these people who ask about him?

You break up with him.
And then when people ask you say 'oh we broke up'. If need be you can add 'we just drifted apart, no biggie, these things happen'.

RIP the plaster off op. No point in a relationship where you never even see eachother anyway is there? And really, you don't sound that fussed about him anyway. He maybe feels the dame but doesn't know how to broach things.

Just have a sit down chat and get it over with.

I have just been through the same thing, I was unhappy for nearly a year. I kept hoping it would get better, but ultimately I was miserable and frustrated. I spoke to him numerous times but nothing improved, in the end he just didn’t feature in my future anymore. I was sick of being upset and didn’t want to waste another 6 months of my life with someone who wasn’t on the same page.

We broke up 3 weeks ago, I was sad and had a cry but I can walk away knowing that I tried and it was for the best. We have been completely no contact since, I just don’t have anything to say to him anymore.
However no one can make that decision for you, have you spoken to him about it?

Thanks Glitterb,

I enjoyed our time together and when I was with him, I always found our time together fun and relaxing. Stuff outside of our relationship has changed now as in his job and I didn't enter into our relationship expecting to spend the majority of our time apart. There's another issue now too. He's putting a lot of effort into his new job and I think his new employer is getting more out of my partner. I think he's perhaps getting the workload of 2 or 3 people out of my partner. He was working yesterday and he never even got a break in his 12 hour day. That's crazy. That's another issue imo. In that a lot of stress will build up and it's just going to be another element to build a bigger gap between us.

I'm happy and confident in the decision of bringing an end to our relationship. I just need to build up the courage now to go ahead and dump him.

@BouncyDaisy completely understand, it was the same for me. Things changed in the relationship and I ended up being the one sat around waiting for him to find the time for me.

Good luck, It’s always rubbish to break up