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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling low

2 replies

Milkandhoney888 · 20/06/2021 13:55

This may sound so pathetic, but i feel so sad, i feel sad my children who have an absolutely useless dad. I'm sat here at home with my children, my dad's away, my partner has gone to see his children and his dad. And i feel so sad, i feel sad at the fact that this wasn't the way I wanted my experience of having children to be, i never wanted a split family. I see how amazing my partner is with his children and how involved and loving he is, and it breaks me that I and my children got such a crap deal. All these happy family picture's ect and i just long for that, but know that I've had my chance. Anyway here's to the self wallowing

OP posts:
secondspringing · 20/06/2021 14:28

I feel like that too. I actually feel guilty that he is their dad.
I feel really envious too of women whose love for their husband is increased when they see how great he is with the children. Seeing what a selfish fuck he was regards to his children is what finally woke me up to who he was.
I really wanted the happily family thing too. I do make an active effort to stop myself feeling like that when I am out though. I remind myself that the kids are happy and we are having a nice day. And that is good. You have to keep doing those mental exercises to cope. Allow yourself to feel the pain for ten minutes or whatever. Then focus on changing your perspective.

Milkandhoney888 · 20/06/2021 14:39

Yes i feel the guilt too, i look at my partner and think how lucky his children are. And don't get me wrong he is very good with mine, but it's not the same. I just wanted the family Christmases, and birthdays ect I'm the same i left when i watched him be an abusive, lazy twat to them too. Makes it harder as a lot of people around me are now having their families, I'm getting older and just feel I've completely missed the boat

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