First phone appointment with solicitor. What do I need to know and ask?

[BigChoiceToMake]

Name Changed for this as it’s pretty outing if you know me

I’m unhappy in my marriage.

We’ve not been happy for a long time, not slept in the same room or had sex for 5 years.

When we started our family 15 years ago I went part time and after loads of childcare issues I dropped a grade at work to take a more flexible role that meant we didn’t need regular childcare.

I feel completely disrespected after ‘D’H has made several big discussions in the last 5 years that have affected all of the family without any discussion with me at all.

We’re having relate counselling but all it seems to do is highlight the huge gulf between us.

I’m thinking that to be happy, I need to leave him. But I need to know what I might be entitled to financially if I do. I don’t want the kids to suffer as a result of my actions by being squashed into a 1 bedroom flat in the wrong part of town with me (all I could realistically afford).

I’m still working part time and don’t feel that if we do part company that it would do our dc any good for me to be around less by working more. Obviously my pension is far smaller than it might have been if I’d not put my career second for the sake of our dc.

What type of information do I need to have to hand to give them solicitor and what specifics should I ask her in order to help me find out what I could claim (benefits and from him)?

As much information as you can find about assets and income for both of you - house value, equity in house, pensions, savings, loans, salary, bonuses etc.

What you think the children's living arrangements are likely to be if you split.

Ok great. I can get most of that, I don’t know his exact salary but can hazard a decent guess.

He goes to work every morning before the kids are even up and looking after them didn’t feature in his thinking when he recently accepted a new job (even though I was working full time at that time to cover for him being made redundant) so I think they’d definitely be with me in the week. Because of that I’d really prefer to stay in the family home but I definitely can’t afford that on my part time wage. He’s not a bad Dad and I know the dc would definitely want to spend time with him.