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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is it over?

2 replies

hadenough2 · 13/06/2021 20:07

So me and my boyfriend have been together for 5 years. We have a two year old son. At the beginning of our relationship he used to go out on nights out a lot and ignore me for hours. Sometimes wouldn't hear from him all night till the next evening at 6pm. We split up for a bit then got back together and I got pregnant straight away. 5 months after I give birth he cheated on me with a girl he worked with. I found out through text. I stayed with him.

Anyway, since the cheating had happened my self confidence has gone right down. Like I feel worthless, ugly, disgusting you name it I feel it. That may sound stupid but I do. I feel like I've lost myself a bit.

We barley have sex, we're never affectionate. I don't remember the last time we told each other we loved each other. I know that's not what makes a relationship but it is nice.

We've been arguing for a few days bevquse im sick of the way he speaks to me. Anyway, we was talking/arguing today and I just said I'm not happy the way this relationship is. He said well I'm a grown woman and I should go make myself happy. Ok I understand that to an extent but why can't he try and make me happy?

I'm too scared to leave him, we rent and I wouldn't be able to afford it on my own. I know he's been with another girl but I can't imagine him being in a relationship with someone else.

I don't know what to do 😩

OP posts:
Treacletoots · 13/06/2021 20:20

Jesus Christ OP. With all due respect, it's no longer 1950. Women no longer have to tolerate abusive behaviour from men. What happened to you growing up that made you accept such a low bar in a potential partner?

I would have dumped him after he went AWOL all those years ago, not hang around to see what he was going to do next to disrespect you.

Kick him out. Find somewhere cheaper to rent and have a bit of time to work on yourself to understand why you've accepted such shitty behaviour from men.

Tell your landlord your situation, they'd be much happier to let you breach your contract to move on to somewhere cheaper than you not pay the rent for months.

Sunflower1970 · 13/06/2021 21:29

You know you need to leave.

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