What’s the next step...?

[pharmgirl88]

Been in my relationship for 4 years and spent at least the last 2 years unhappy... organising child care all falls on me, he’ll play with our son for 5/10 min then goes on his phone, does very little around the house, etc. There’s so many more ins & outs but I’ll keep it brief.

He tends to go in moods and not speak to me for days at a time... we’re on our 5th or 6th silent episode this year. Then when he’s ready to talk again it’s like there’s no issue. I don’t want my son to see this as normal behaviour.

Financially, I’d be ok without him, I’d probably be ALOT happier and would actually get a break if we separated... so why am I struggling to leave?

There is absolutely NO POINT to this relationship!

Honestly, you will feel like you are on holiday once you end it. The sense of freedom is incredible.

Hi, I think you are struggling to leave because the alternative is challenging and uncertain. Change takes a lot of courage. I’m not in the club that says leave, leave etc. but if you do in fact make that call I’d imagine it’ll be huge for you. Weigh it up, all the pros and cons. And at the end ask if you can see any improvement possible counselling would make - would yr partner be open to that. But if in your heart you don’t honestly want or can’t make a life with him, well then you make a decision and a plan towards a more peaceful life. Good luck.

If you're not happy with how things stand, then you need to make change happen.

Nothing will change unless you are the driving force behind it.

If you want to give your P the opportunity to change his behaviour, then tell him you're not happy, and unless things change, it'll be over for you.

If you've reached the end of the road in the relationship, then you need to make your preparations and then end it.

Life is way too short to waste staying for years in an unhappy relationship, simply because the alternative is 'uncertain'.

You know you can do this on your own financially, and perhaps he'll finally 'step up' and be a better father to your child once you are no longer there to 'pick up the slack' of his crappy parenting.